I was looking at my college webpage on the Internet Wayback Machine last night (the server has been off-line for some years now). Some of you may remember that I rambled quite a bit back then. I read some of my old "blog" entries -- my posts were called "Thoughts of the Day" and resembled a blog, though no one had ever heard the term at the time.
Some of my posts were quite funny (and I may share them with you), others were pretty depressing, especially when I remember what motivated them. Anyway... reading these old musings prompted me to ramble a bit in my own mind last night:
What if all evidence contradicts God?
So, I'm facing a situation where, in my mind, all things point to one answer and in my heart, God is telling me something entirely different. It isn't quite so cut and dried as God saying 2 + 2 equals 5, but I am quite confused. I'm questioning God, questioning my interpretation of his purpose, and just generally confused.
Every fiber of my being screams that X is true, all evidence indicates that X is true, independent observers have confirmed that X appears to be true... When I ask God if X is true, I get an ambiguous answer that seems to indicate that it is in fact NOT true (I really don't get an answer at all). I suppose it could be that one part of my brain refuses to accept his answer and is therefore looking past it. It could be that I'm simply to dense to see that God is CONFIRMING my suspicion that X is true. I dunno.
I really wish he'd go ahead and tell me one way or another.
Lord, help me understand your purpose and intentions. I'm blunt -- send me a lightning bolt (figuratively) or something, please....
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I think we all feel like that sometimes. But that is what seperates us from folks that have faith and those that don't. It would be really easy to just do anything that we want on earth and not have to answer for it, but it's not so. Nobody has returned from the other side to tell us if there really is a God, a heaven, a hell (well I think those Richard Simmmons videos are hell but that's not the point). I guess what I'm trying to say is sometimes the human mind cannot grasp the mysteries of the universe. Science indicates a big bang started the universe. That could be logical, just as two plus two logically equals four. But God said that He created the world and those of us with FAITH believe it's so. I believe that it's just human nature to try and figure out how something works or how something happened. Our minds just can't understand what God's does. I wonder if God will tell us all of the answers when we get to heaven. Something tells me we won't even care when we get there!
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