Wisdom teeth

I have no idea what function they serve except to create pain and confusion in patients and wealth for "Oral Surgeons".

I'll confess that I felt nothing for nearly two days -- I suppose that's long enough for me to forget exactly what the people who did this to me look like. At this point, I can't exactly see how this is "better for me". Perhaps one day I will... one day when I can eat again the solid foods I love so much like... bread... and steak...

The last thing I remember is the doctor saying, "This may pinch a little," as he slipped the IV into my arm. It didn't pinch. At all.

I woke up with a chin that felt the size of something in a Jay Leno caricature. I'm serious: In my first moments of wakefulness I was embarrassed at its size and scared of dragging it or catching it on something. I couldn't speak, my lips were made of silly putty, but  I was surrounded by the most beautiful angels dressed in nurse's scrubs. I communicated, as best I could, my appreciation for whatever it was they'd done for me (I'm ever grateful and thankful -- I learned along time ago when dealing with women always to say "Thank You" and "I'm Sorry"). I think I may have gotten a few phone numbers as well, but it seems I wrote the numbers in some strange language that existed only for that few moments, a language based on angular criss-crossing lines and squiggles indecipherable now even to me, its writer (I recognize my penmanship, even in this strange language).

And so I existed in a senseless daze for the next several days -- slowly rising from the depths of euphoric ignorance, a world with no feeling, to a half-wakeful hell where my jaws ached, but not anywhere I could pinpoint.

I am convinced there is a vast conspiracy. In a few days or weeks, I will receive a cheerfully worded letter, "Welcome to the Largest Medical Hoax in History!" A hoax where, by vague references to minor discomfort and funny stories about how silly we act when we've just woken from anesthesia with numb face (all the "milk shake stories" you've heard) we encourage other unwary, uninitiated individuals to have their jaws cranked open and their wisdom teeth forcibly extracted from their happy little homes. I'll learn fun phrases like, "Well, there was some discomfort, but everyone experiences pain differently," and "You'll be fine after a few days -- ice-cream and mashed potatoes are good!"

Yeah, that's fun, but here's the bottom line, and listen to me carefully: Don't have your wisdom teeth surgically removed unless there's a valid medical or dental reason to do so. If you're in pain (headaches, toothaches, etc) or there's some danger of your jaw being misplaced, go ahead, but consider this surgery carefully.

I'm eating at McAlister's right now... I missed food.

 

Here's a picture a brave soul captured of the tooth-monster on Friday night... It's been sharpened for your benefit.

 

 

 

Technorati Tags: Wisdom Teeth,Surgery,Pain

New year, new rules...

My mother said several years ago that she would begin saying what she really thinks... thank goodness she hasn't completely followed through with that threat. Each year, around the beginning of the new year, she tells us how we should assert ourselves, make positive changes in our lives, and how *she* is going to change in the coming year.

Here's her New Year's Day proclamation:

 

Technorati Tags: Leopard,video,funny

See Beautiful Cincinnati

The Jackson Sun had a teaser today about flights now being available to Cincinnati from McKellar-Sipes regional airport in Jackson. Delta Connection flights begin tomorrow, November 18.

This excites me for several reasons. Cincinnati is a great city to visit. Great food, one of the finest zoos in the nation, concerts and shows, these are all available in Cincinnati. It's too far to drive quickly, but I can see hopping on a puddle-jumper and flying into town for a few days.

I had a look at pricing:

So -- I could fly to Cincinnati for $140 round-trip to celebrate the new year!

I wonder what's going on in Ohio on December 31? What are you doing New Year's Eve?

 

Technorati Tags: Cincinnati,Jackson TN,Delta,Flights,Cheap,Entertainment

And he sings!

My brother takes "voice" from some folks in Alamo, TN. They have two annual shows -- one in the summer and one at Christmas. This year, Samuel's solo was "The Music of the Night" from the Phantom of the Opera. He was amazing... Here are a few clips.



And his group...

She just lay down to sleep...

Goodbye.

Technorati Tags:pet, dog, death, German Shepherd

Memphis music

I spent the weekend at the Memphis Music and Heritage Festival in and around the Center for Southern Folklore on Main Street in Memphis. This is an annual event for me -- I think this is my ninth festival. I've been working for and with the Center since 1997.

It's truly an amazing event put together almost entirely by volunteers. The Music and Heritage Festival is the largest free heritage festival of its kind in the Southeast, I think. Yeah, I said FREE. More than 100 acts played over two days. Everything from Choctaw Dancers to Klezmer to the Bobby Rush himself made this years festival a HUGE success.

I am more and more amazed every year with Judy Peiser, the Center's Executive Director, particularly. She seems to have boundless energy and a boundless drive to promote ALL facets of culture represented in the South at the Festival. Judy is simply amazing.

As I say, I've worked with the Center for Southern Folklore for the last decade or so -- I've met hundreds of musicians, artists, and entertainment professionals. I've shook hands with B.B. King (and served him dinner) several times, I've spent quality time with Marty Stuart and the late Rufus Thomas, I've spent hours with record producers, concert promoters, painters, sculptors, and who knows who else. I've never gotten a picture with any of them. I'm an idiot -- in many cases, I was ALONE with these folks. I never thought it was proper or my place to be a fan; I wanted to do my job and make these people comfortable. I've decided to change my outlook slightly: Yes, I'll continue to do my job and support these folks in whatever professional way that I can, but I'm also gonna get PICTURES.

I have a hodge-podge of responsibilities at the Music and Heritage Festival. Primarily, I'm nominally over the operations of the bar and food service area inside what is known as "Folklore Hall". I'm a problem solver, too, fixing problems and putting out fires that may crop up in and near the venue for which I'm responsible. I'm also responsible for making sure the artists get paid. Yeah, I get to hand out the checks -- and that puts me directly in front of the performers.

That's really one of the greatest parts of my job at the festival: I get to meet and greet every performer. Many of the "regulars" know my name; almost all of them know my face by now. Many begin smiling when they see me, call my name, or just generally seem glad to see me. I'd be glad to see me, too, of course, as I have their check! This year, I got several pictures with some of my favorite artists; unfortunately, I *still* missed a few of my favorites.

I did manage to get pictures with two of my primary targets, however: Eddie Bond and Kate Campbell. Of course, in all the pictures, I look like someone's been beating me with a club and the performers look like they've been drenched -- it was hot in Memphis this last weekend (even inside it was warm under the stage lights).

I had a great time -- even though my feet and knees are just now getting back to normal. I can't wait for next year.

For more information on the Center for Southern Folklore, visit http://www.southernfolklore.com. There's also a special web-page for the festival at http://www.memphismusicandheritage festival.com.

I recommend reading Andria Lisle's excellent article on the festival in the Memphis Flyer (click).

Also, Tom Bremer wrote a nice blurb on Kate Campbell (click) in his reflections on this years festival.

Technorati Tags:Center for Southern Folklore, Memphis Music and Heritage Festival, Memphis, Music

Consequences and Repercussions

Choices are interesting things. We choose what to eat, we choose where to go, where to live, who to hang out with, what to wear, what to watch on television. We make hundreds of choices every day, certainly.

Choices have consequences and repercussions.

We often analyze our what we consider *big* choices and weigh the "pros and cons". We often do not analyze "every day" choices -- we just decide and move on.

What I forget is that ALL choices have consequences and repercussions. I may choose what I believe is the right thing for me and, if I choose correctly, the outcome will be largely positive. Regardless, all choices have consequences and repercussions -- sometimes these consequences and repercussions may be unpleasant or disagreeable to me.

You, too, have made choices which were likely the right choices for you, but those choices have consequences and repercussions which may have been disagreeable. Think for a moment on choices you've made, perhaps without considering the total outcome. Are you satisfied with the results? Do the pros outweigh the cons?

Some choices can be made over. Some cannot. We must be prepared to live with the consequences of our choices.

Choices involving people are the hardest to make again. Take, for example, "first impressions": we're told you only get one chance to make a good first impression. People make choices, judgments about us based on their impressions of us. It's hard, for me, to overcome my first impression of someone.

People are unpredictable. When our choices involve people, we cannot often accurately gauge their response our their subsequent behavior. I very infrequently make "final" choices about people. My friends say I sit on the fence about too many things, but I think, as concerns people, you can't sit on the fence enough. Taking extreme, precipitate action which binds you to someone or alienates you from someone is a serious choice and should be considered carefully. I don't, generally, make such choices (though sometimes they're made for me). I'd rather wait, keep my cards close to my vest, and see how things develop. I think I'm happier that way and I hopefully (certainly?) make few enemies.

With few exceptions choices, while not entirely reversible, can be "fixed". I can choose to never eat a hotdog with jalapeños again (and save my poor digestive system), I can choose to always buckle my seat belt after a car accident, I can choose to divorce my wife or husband (not pleasant, but it is a "fix"), I can choose to forgive someone for something perceived as "unforgivable", I can choose to always drink gin and never drink tequila, I can choose to always fly from Nashville and never from Memphis, I can give people second chances and I can accept second chances from others.

Technorati Tags:choices, consequences, repercussions, decisions

Come on, ring that bell

The only people who ever ring my doorbell are the police, evangelists, and people selling stuff (I guess evangelists are sort of selling stuff). I don't like it. I don't like company. I don't like people "dropping by" or any of that mess. I'm single and male. My house is a wreck. It's not a bio-hazard; I trash food scraps, etc, but there's mail everywhere, books piled up waist high, no room on my couch, etc.

When the bell rings early Saturday morning, I assume it's the police delivering a "package". I get a packet from City Hall every two weeks with reports, agendas, and so forth. I don't normally bother dressing for the police: I just scamper down the hall and throw open the door. The officer gets the pleasure of seeing me in all my unclothed glory. If I'm wearing skimpy underclothes and I'm feeling charitable, I might throw on a pair of "sleeping shorts".

I've found that answering the door nearly naked discourages evangelists from returning. I'm guessing they have a list somewhere and I'm on it: Single/Male, answers door naked, crazed expression

My hair is generally nuts in the morning. To the left is an illustrative picture of how I look when I'm first woken up. It was taken in 2004, but except for no beard and less hair on my head, it's pretty much dead-on. I look like a nearly naked drug-crazed maniac. To enhance the effect, I generally smile broadly when I see new people and giggle to myself softly the whole time they're plying their Jesus.

The no-clothes-maniac routine works so well, I've started stripping when people ring my bell even in the middle of the day, afternoon, or evening. I quickly wet my hands, muss up my hair, and shuffle to the door. I know I've accomplished my goal when whomever is calling jumps back in horror when I fling open the door and start grinning like a nut. If I could only smell worse...

Several months ago, I went bowling on a Friday night. Had a great time. That Saturday morning I woke up early (heaven knows why), and was milling around the house, dressed in the clothes I'd worn the night before. I SMELLED like I'd spent the night in a strip-joint. Not hard to imagine, really: The bowling alley was filled with smoke and I had perspired in my clothes that night. I heard some folks shuffling around outside and opened the door just as an elderly gentleman with a light-bulb was about to ring the bell.

Evangelists. They must not have gotten the memo. He looked shocked at my appearance (even though I was fully clothed, I probably had food stains and I know my hair was a wreck). He and hist little band of proselytizers stepped back when the smell hit them. "Uh, good morning, sir, I'm sorry to have woken you, but I'd like to invite you to our special services this week." Giggling, I replied, "No, you didn't wake me hahahahahah I've been up for HOURS!" He handed me the light-bulb, simultaneously backing away, "Jesus is the light of the world. We'll pray for you." They left rather quickly. I put the bulb in a burned out fixture in my den.

Technorati Tags:evangelists, waking up, scary, morning

Saying "I'm Sorry"

Never ruin an apology with an excuse. ~Kimberly Johnson

The other week I had a long conversation with a friend of mine who had made a mistake. I don't recall the mistake, but she was heartbroken. She had hurt a friend and didn't know how to fix it. She explained to me the circumstances and kept providing reasons for her actions. I remember stopping her and saying, "Dear, there should be no 'BUT' after 'I'm Sorry'." I could tell she was already rehearsing her apology with me.

Before someone accuses me of twisting facts or thinly veiling my thoughts: I honestly don't remember who she was -- I remember it being a girl. I also don't remember what the mistake was.

I'm really good at apologizing. I've had to be; I make so many mistakes that I get plenty of practice. Often, when someone walks up to me, I begin apologizing immediately. It's safer that way. I'm almost always sure I've done something wrong.

I've learned that the shortest apology is the best: "I'm sorry." Especially with women. Trying to explain one's actions is a sure fire way to make a woman madder.

It's okay to define what you're apologizing for, but be careful. If you say, "I'm sorry for backing over your flowers with my bulldozer," and the person isn't mad about that, but rather, is mad because their pet hamster was in the flowers at the time, you may come off as insensitive. If someone is angry and you're hoping an apology will make it better, be sure why they're angry before you start.

I'll state the obvious: Don't apologize unless you're sincere. Nothing is worse than an insincere apology. If you regret your actions, admit it. If you're not sincere, don't bother opening your mouth, please. Notice, I didn't write, "If you regret the consequences of your actions," above. Apologizing to get what YOU want or to make YOU feel better is a lame-ass reason to apologize. You should apologize simply because you were wrong or because you hurt someone.

Back to the "but" of this story: Seriously, we often take the meat out of an apology by saying "but" after "I'm sorry". Trying to place the blame elsewhere invalidates an apology. To apologize means to admit that YOU have made a mistake -- it's no one's fault but your own. Allow the person you're apologizing to provide an excuse; often times they will when they figure out you're not trying to weasel out of it with a "but" statement. If they don't provide an excuse, don't fret. You've done your part -- you've admitted your mistake and taken responsibility for it. The proper response to an offered apology is to accept it. The proper response to an apology is to forgive.

Technorati Tags:I'm sorry, apology, relationships

"Thinning hair"

I went to a dinner party a few months ago and noticed in some of the pictures (most of the pictures were embarrassing) that my bald spot is spreading. Yes. I have a receding hairline -- and I think that's sexy an a bit distinguished. The bald spot bothers me. I'm not terribly self-concious about ANYTHING -- you know that, but this isn't the first picture that the spot has jumped out at me.

Probably three years ago -- at the lake -- Tori first pointed out my thinning spot; Patrick and I were comparing hairlines (he's known as "the human forehead" in some circles) and Tori said, "Oooo, look, Nathan's got a bald spot." I thought nothing of it -- it was early in the morning and none of us had showered or primped (we never did on lake mornings). I figured it was just the way my hair was laying that morning. Somewhere in the last few years it's grown.

I asked the lady who cuts my hair about it a few weeks ago -- had she noticed it. "Yes, Nathan, you've always had fine thick hair, but there is a 'weak' spot developing." I asked my Mom about it -- why hadn't she told me, "I thought you knew," she said, "and besides, both your grandfathers were bald by their early thirties." EGAD! Early thirties! Bald Spot! Why didn't someone tell me!!!!!!

I give up
Originally uploaded by churl.

So, I was talking with a friend of mine the other day -- as she was spiking my hair, I think -- and I asked HER about the bald spot. "Yes, Nathan, it's there." She giggled -- not about the bald spot, hopefully, but because she was about to make me look like a punk-wanna-be or something. "What am I to do?" I asked. "You could shave your head -- or get some Rogaine."

Alright. That's an answer I can live with. I like to fix things. If I have a flat tire, I patch it with fix-a-flat or get a new tire. If I have an itch, I put some cream on it. If I have a bald spot, I can smear some foam on it. I mentioned it to my parents, "I'd like some Rogaine (and a tandem bicycle) for my birthday."

Tonight, before I left the house, my mother gave me some Rogaine foam in a sack, "Here son, I got this for you." My cousin Jimmy shared an uplifting joke before I walked out the door:

Son, people say a men whose hair is thinning up front are great THINKERS. You know men whose hair is thinning in back are great LOVERS. If it's thinning in front and in back it means you THINK you're a great LOVER.

He cackled. I smirked. I'm thinning in the back; draw your own conclusions.

I'm going to make my first application to my "warm dry scalp" tonight before bed. I'll let you know.

Technorati Tags:bald spot, Rogaine, thinning hair