From the Home Front

Wisdom teeth

2008-02-21T17:46:00.001-06:00

I have no idea what function they serve except to create pain and confusion in patients and wealth for "Oral Surgeons".

I'll confess that I felt nothing for nearly two days -- I suppose that's long enough for me to forget exactly what the people who did this to me look like. At this point, I can't exactly see how this is "better for me". Perhaps one day I will... one day when I can eat again the solid foods I love so much like... bread... and steak...

The last thing I remember is the doctor saying, "This may pinch a little," as he slipped the IV into my arm. It didn't pinch. At all.

I woke up with a chin that felt the size of something in a Jay Leno caricature. I'm serious: In my first moments of wakefulness I was embarrassed at its size and scared of dragging it or catching it on something. I couldn't speak, my lips were made of silly putty, but I was surrounded by the most beautiful angels dressed in nurse's scrubs. I communicated, as best I could, my appreciation for whatever it was they'd done for me (I'm ever grateful and thankful -- I learned along time ago when dealing with women always to say "Thank You" and "I'm Sorry"). I think I may have gotten a few phone numbers as well, but it seems I wrote the numbers in some strange language that existed only for that few moments, a language based on angular criss-crossing lines and squiggles indecipherable now even to me, its writer (I recognize my penmanship, even in this strange language).

And so I existed in a senseless daze for the next several days -- slowly rising from the depths of euphoric ignorance, a world with no feeling, to a half-wakeful hell where my jaws ached, but not anywhere I could pinpoint.

I am convinced there is a vast conspiracy. In a few days or weeks, I will receive a cheerfully worded letter, "Welcome to the Largest Medical Hoax in History!" A hoax where, by vague references to minor discomfort and funny stories about how silly we act when we've just woken from anesthesia with numb face (all the "milk shake stories" you've heard) we encourage other unwary, uninitiated individuals to have their jaws cranked open and their wisdom teeth forcibly extracted from their happy little homes. I'll learn fun phrases like, "Well, there was some discomfort, but everyone experiences pain differently," and "You'll be fine after a few days -- ice-cream and mashed potatoes are good!"

Yeah, that's fun, but here's the bottom line, and listen to me carefully: Don't have your wisdom teeth surgically removed unless there's a valid medical or dental reason to do so. If you're in pain (headaches, toothaches, etc) or there's some danger of your jaw being misplaced, go ahead, but consider this surgery carefully.

I'm eating at McAlister's right now... I missed food.

Here's a picture a brave soul captured of the tooth-monster on Friday night... It's been sharpened for your benefit.

Technorati Tags: Wisdom Teeth,Surgery,Pain

Jackson's Tornado Damage: Let's take a step back

2008-02-12T12:45:00.001-06:00

I've been following the relief and recovery efforts in Jackson following the devastating tornados that left Union University in shambles and so many other people homeless. The damage to Union's facilities was extensive, almost indescribable, and amazing because no one was killed. It's unimaginable, really. It truly does look like a "war zone". Damage estimates exceed $40 million at Union alone.

Let's take a step back, however, and think: The students displaced by the damage to Union's residence halls, for the most part, have somewhere to go -- they have family, places they call "home". Even now, just a week following the storm, arrangements have been made to house all those students.

What about the other $40 million in damages in Jackson (damage estimates for Jackson-Madison County, including Union, top $85 million)? How many people are truly left homeless following this storm?

The news media has focused so much attention on Union that I think we forget that hundreds of people may be homeless, penniless, or jobless (587 homes were damaged, 71 were completely destroyed according to Mayor Jerry Gist).

Technorati Tags: Jackson TN,Tornado,Damage

Actual risk and our value system

2008-01-23T22:30:00.001-06:00

The below is excerpted from a terribly interesting article entitled "10 Ways We Get the Odds Wrong" from Psychology Today. I recommend reading the whole thing.

There's a particularly interesting quiz at the end of the article.

I excerpted the below primarily because I have some acquaintances who constantly tell me how safe marijuana is (especially compared to tobacco and alcohol) and because this seems to be a hot topic, generally. Seems the folks at Psychology Today agree. I need to research exactly why marijuana legislation came about

VIII. We Worry About Teen Marijuana Use, But Not About Teen Sports

Risk arguments cannot be divorced from values.

If the risks of smoking marijuana are coldly compared to those of playing high-school football, parents should be less concerned about pot smoking. Death by marijuana overdose has never been reported, while 13 teen players died of football-related injuries in 2006 alone. And marijuana impairs driving far less than the number one drug used by teens: alcohol. Alcohol and tobacco are also more likely to beget addiction, give rise to cancer, and lead to harder drug use.

If the comparison feels absurd, it's because judgments of risk are inseparable from value judgments. We value physical fitness and the lessons teens learn from sports, but disapprove of unearned pleasure from recreational drugs. So we're willing to accept the higher level of risk of socially preferred activities—and we mentally magnify risks associated with activities society rejects, which leads us to do things like arresting marijuana smokers.

"Risk decisions are not about risks alone," says Slovic. "People usually take risks to get a benefit." The value placed on that benefit is inherently subjective, so decisions about them cannot be made purely "on the science."

Psychology Today: 10 Ways We Get the Odds Wrong

Technorati Tags: news,risk,odds,marijuana

New year, new rules...

2008-01-02T22:21:00.001-06:00

My mother said several years ago that she would begin saying what she really thinks... thank goodness she hasn't completely followed through with that threat. Each year, around the beginning of the new year, she tells us how we should assert ourselves, make positive changes in our lives, and how *she* is going to change in the coming year.

Here's her New Year's Day proclamation:

Technorati Tags: Leopard,video,funny

Justin sings

2007-12-27T17:32:00.001-06:00

I got a new camera for Christmas and I love it. If you follow my flickr pictures, you'll hopefully notice my posting many more pictures in the coming weeks and months. This camera also includes the ability to record videos...

I visited Justin and Allison last night when they returned from Middle Tennessee. Allison got this neat new head scarf that's constructed in such a way that it stays on your head (it has a little "head pocket"). Justin put it on and we asked him to sing "Mary Did You Know?" -- he didn't sing that... instead, we got this:

Thanks Justin!

Technorati Tags: Video,Funny,Song

flickr Statistics amaze me

2007-12-21T00:21:00.001-06:00

Those of you who use flickr (and have "PRO" accounts) may have noticed last week that you now can see more detailed statistics on your photos. It's pretty neat to see from which websites you're getting visitors, who's viewing your pictures. For instance, I notice from my statistics, that some at wikiHow wrote on article titled "How to Recycle Your Socks" and used one of my flickr pictures to illustrate the article.

Here's a snapshot of my statistics page -- detailed stats are available only for the last 34 days or so (how long they've been gathering detailed stats). The numbers below are truly "all time" numbers, though:

I'm charmed that "Nathan gets a handful" is number one... Not one of my most flattering pictures, but, I've pretty much committed to sharing everything publicly. Heaven help me if I ever decide to run for high public office -- I'm screwed.

I notice also that for some reason, my picture of the Little Family is consistently ranked very highly. No one has looked at it recently, however.

I can't imagine why the picture of Lindsay with the blue tongue ranks so highly. Here are the most recent (last 34 days or so) referrers (how people found it) for that picture:

My flip flops are very popular. Here's the referrer list (again, only flickr searches) for that picture:

It seems that when you search Yahoo news or images for Destin, some of my pics come up. Same for Jackson, MS and/or the St. Patrick's Day parade.

I'm a *huge* fan of flickr, by the way. I think you all should be uploading your pictures. If you're still thinking about what I should get you for Christmas, I'll be glad to buy my friends/family a pro account on flickr. Just let me know. :)

Technorati Tags: flickr,statistics,technology,strange statistics

Facebook advertising

2007-12-15T22:56:00.001-06:00

I know that Facebook is a commercial enterprise, they're in the business of making money. I don't pay anything for my use of their service -- the ads they present on their pages pay for my usage...

I like Facebook. I love the clean interface (though it's becoming more cluttered every day). MySpace allows users to customize their profile pages in almost every way imaginable and those customized pages are often hard on the eyes and on the computer (some pages cause my poor laptop to literally grind to a halt). Facebook, again, is cool and clean.

Mostly, though, I like Facebook because they seem to me to be "good guys". Yeah, they're making money, but they're perceived as being concerned about their users and doing the right thing. Kind of like Google, in my mind. "Don't be evil" and all that.

This evening, however, I was confronted with something that made me stop and think for a moment.

Click the above for a larger version -- you'll notice (even in this small picture) a large "Continue" button in "Facebook Blue". It looks like a genuine Facebook button... but it's not. It takes the user to the site of an advertiser.

I don't mind the ads, I've already said that. I don't like being tricked, however. I wish Facebook would limit these kinds of ads -- their presence seems duplicitous and not at all in line with my view of the "good Facebook".

Technorati Tags: Facebook,ads,social networking

Christmas shopping.. blech

2007-12-15T22:04:00.001-06:00

I've done very little Christmas shopping. I've bought a few things for my parents (to give people), but in truth I've really bought nothing for anyone. Those who know me know that I don't give many Christmas presents anyway -- and they almost always come after Christmas. I hate trying to figure out what to get people; I don't want to give meaningless trinkets... To that end, I present my Christmas 2007 Gift Survey (link). If anyone has anything particularly interesting on their list, I might say something about it (won't use your name, of course). You're also, free, of course, to discuss that as a comment to this post!

I meant to publish this several weeks ago... :)

Can you hear this?

2007-12-13T22:06:00.001-06:00

According to Wikipedia, these sounds started out as a way to repel "young loiterers" outside shops in Europe. List below are certain tones that you should (or shouldn't) be able to hear based on age. Apparently, young people are using these sounds as ring-tones so the old folks (teachers, etc) can't tell when they're getting text messages or telephone calls in class. Give this a try and let me know, in the comments, when you can't hear the tones.

The the one labeled 30 & younger is audible to me... The 16.7khz tone (younger than 24) is barely audible to me. The 17.7khz tone (younger than 24) MIGHT be audible -- or I might just wish to be hearing it. Beyond that, I can't hear a thing. Really: I want to know your results!

I may use this as my "alert" tone on the instant messenger at work.

8khz - Everyone

10khz 60 & Younger

12khz 50 & Younger

14.1khz 49 & Younger

14.9khz 39 & Younger

15.8khz 30 & Younger

16.7khz < 24

17.7khz < 24

18.8khz < 24

19.8khz < 24

21.1khz < 24

22.4khz < 24

The source for these particular tones is Free Mosquito Ringtones.

Technorati Tags: Teen Buzz,Mosquito,Mosquito Ringtone,ringtone

Funny moments for Doctors

2007-12-12T23:38:00.001-06:00

3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a "massive internal fart."
Submitted by! Dr. Susan Steinberg

Funny moments for Doctors | Bubblejive.com

I was amused.. Click the link for some more funny stories.

I remember hearing a story about an intern who one time visited an establishment specializing in "adult entertainment". This intern, we'll call him Dr. John, was with a group celebrating the upcoming nuptials of a friend. At these establishments, as I understand it, the entertainers or dancers (if you prefer) often walk around to solicit business ("private dances"). One such entertainer approached Dr. John and rubbed her fingers across his shoulders, bent low, and ran her fingers up his thighs in a rather intimate manner. John was thunderstruck. He said, "Good goobledy gosh, what are you doing?" The entertainer replied, "Don't worry, honey, I'm a professional." John, thinking quickly, placed his hand on a spot that isn't generally permitted or encouraged in such establishments... the entertainer's eyes widened and she gasped, "What do you think you're doing????" John replied, "Don't worry, honey, I'm a doctor."

That's how the story was told to me, at least. :)

Man stabs pit bull in attack

2007-12-05T23:30:00.001-06:00

When McElrath looked outside, he saw a pit bill attacking his pet. After repeatedly beating the pit with a skillet to no effect, McElrath retrieved an eight-inch butcher knife and began to stab the pit bull.

Dyersburg State Gazette: Story: Man stabs pit bull in attack

Wow. My father told me about this a few weeks ago. I looked up the story tonight.

I don't hate pit bulls, I don't even dislike them. I hate that they have so often become status symbols and even weapons. I am disgusted with irresponsible pet owners. I am sad that two animals, in this case, died because of an irresponsible dog owner failed to properly restrain his animal, that that animal was not properly cared for even when his owner was incarcerated.

Technorati Tags: pit bull,pit bull attack,animal welfare

Too much information

2007-12-03T17:43:00.001-06:00

AMEN

Technorati Tags: Chistmas,Cartoon,Funny

What's the point?

2007-11-19T23:24:00.001-06:00

I bought a loaf of bread at Wal-Mart last night.

I bought wheat bread -- I can't think of a sandwich that's not better on wheat bread (and I had a long conversation with Judy about just that topic today -- she seems to think fried eggs are better on white bread). I especially love Peanut Butter on wheat bread, flavorful wheat bread. Mmmm. Good.

So, I'm shopping for bread at Wal-Mart. There are, literally, dozens of brands and varieties available. It's much easier to buy bread at Foodrite. A larger selection is not always better for this small-town boy.

I have made my selection and I notice that right next to my chosen loaf is another loaf of the same type -- but it's only a HALF loaf. "Wow," I thought, "great, I probably won't eat this full loaf before it goes stale. I'll buy a half loaf." Yeah, good thought, but I checked the price (something I'm not known to do). I would expect the half-loaf to be half the price of the full loaf.... wrong. It was about 75% the cost of the full thing. So, my math friends, what's my return on investment?

I dunno. I don't care.

I might eat more than half this loaf. I might eat as much as 75%! I'm just gonna take my chances with the whole loaf.

Technorati Tags: bread,loaf,half-loaf,Wal-Mart

Fun on the forums

2007-11-19T22:24:00.000-06:00

I'm amazed at what people are willing to say online.

Here's my favorite from the recent past:

Both of these are from the Jackson Sun online forums...

See Beautiful Cincinnati

2007-11-17T16:44:00.001-06:00

The Jackson Sun had a teaser today about flights now being available to Cincinnati from McKellar-Sipes regional airport in Jackson. Delta Connection flights begin tomorrow, November 18.

This excites me for several reasons. Cincinnati is a great city to visit. Great food, one of the finest zoos in the nation, concerts and shows, these are all available in Cincinnati. It's too far to drive quickly, but I can see hopping on a puddle-jumper and flying into town for a few days.

I had a look at pricing:

So -- I could fly to Cincinnati for $140 round-trip to celebrate the new year!

I wonder what's going on in Ohio on December 31? What are you doing New Year's Eve?

Technorati Tags: Cincinnati,Jackson TN,Delta,Flights,Cheap,Entertainment

9 Words That Don't Mean What You Think

2007-11-15T23:57:00.001-06:00

9 Words That Don't Mean What You Think | Cracked.com

Irregardless

People think it means:
Regardless.

Actually means:
Not a damned thing.

This is not a word. Now, we have no problem with making up words (if a particular scent can only be described as "fartalicious," we reserve the right to call it so). The problem with this one is "regardless" already means something isn't worth regard (that's why the "less" is there) so adding the "ir" to it means... it's worth regarding again? Who knows.

My father and I have discussed this word for years. When he wants to especially aggravate me -- or make a point about how ridiculous something is, he'll use this word.

Yeah Dad. You're right. Click the link above to see some other words that are commonly misused.

Technorati Tags: irregardless,words,english,dumb

Bluetooth

2007-11-09T18:24:00.001-06:00

I broke down right after my birthday and bought a bluetooth headset for my cell-phone. It's obnoxious, yes, but it's also addictive. The thing is feather-weight; I won't say I don't notice that it's there, but it's certainly better than any other cell headset I've ever used. And CONVENIENT! I simply press a button on the side of the headset and say the name of the person to whom I wish to speak and TA DA.. I'm connected. I don't even have to find my cell-phone -- it can be in my briefcase behind the car seat or even across the room. Truly amazing. Oh... and I can use the stupid thing with the computer and with my desk phone too.

Bluetooth headsets are becoming ubiquitous. You're not a yuppy without a bluetooth headset. You're not successful unless you have a bluetooth headset. Whatever.. I just think it's incredibly useful.

More than ever, though, I find myself talking into the air, waving my hands, and seemingly acting insane. People stare -- yes, they do. If they see the tiny little headset perched on my ear, they may get the picture, but elseways they think I'm just nuts... Lots of people think I'm nuts anyway; I'm used to it.

It *is* horribly rude to use the thing in restaurants or overmuch in public. It's useful driving, walking down the street, etc, but I'm not about to sit in the Toot-N-Tell-It talking on my bluetooth headset. While the sound quality is acceptable, one does have to speak up a bit to make certain the person on the other end can hear you. This louder than normal tone isn't appropriate for places you're going to hanging around very long. You should piss people off and then move on... Don't use it in church, at the funeral home, in a restaurant, the doctor's office, on the bus, on the plane, etc....

See this hand video for tips on dealing bluetooth nerds in restaurants:

Technorati Tags: bluetooth,rude,annoying,technology,Larry David

Men's restroom etiquette

2007-11-08T23:20:00.001-06:00

I was speaking the other day with a lady about the restrooms in a convenience store in Trenton. For years, this particular store's restrooms had been ATROCIOUS; they were absolute hell-holes. I remember well when people sneaked into the restroom to smoke crack and other illicit substances -- and that wasn't the worst smell that seemed always to pervade the rooms... Recently, however, the store's been undergoing a major renovation. Along with the rest of the store, the restrooms have been completely redone. They are now sparklingly clean, pristine, lovely, a wonder to behold in a small town like Trenton. This conversation about the restrooms in the convenience store led to a conversation on bathroom etiquette -- especially among men.

I know that this topic has been covered by numerous bloggers and pundits on the web, but I thought I'd give my take on this most delicate and important subject.

Men's restrooms are magical. They are like the fortress of solitude. On entering a restroom, all men become blind deaf mutes. We see nothing. We hear nothing. We do not speak. A roaring conversation can be continued down the hall to the restroom but once we pass the solemn thresh-hold of the lavatory, we become as monks sworn to silence. At most, we might communicate with a grunt, a nod of recognition, but more commonly, nothing is said, no one's presence is acknowledged. It's as if you become an island of your own in the restroom. Eye contact is strictly avoided -- but more importantly, we don't really look *anywhere*. Focus on the task at hand, as it were, and move along. Keep your head down, your hands to yourself and no one gets hurt.

I had the privilege (I guess) of sharing the restroom with a recently re-elected governor several months ago. It was one of the strangest experiences of my life -- I'm an outgoing person, I talk to everyone. He's much the same way, after all, he's a politician. Though we were almost side-by-side (there was one empty urinal between us), I didn't even recognize that he was in the restroom until the attendant (this was a swanky affair) became confused as to who he should offer soap (as we arrived at the sinks at the exact same moment). Of course, I let the governor go first.

There are dozens of resources detailing proper bathroom etiquette available on the internet... Here's an excerpt from the International Center for Bathroom Etiquette:

To choose the middle of three urinals is to commit an act of pure, unadulterated selfishness, and for it one should be ashamed. Instead, one should immediately proceed the the end urinal which is furthest from the door, or alternatively, best smelling.

What are your thoughts about restroom etiquette?

Technorati Tags: men's restroom,etiquette,protocol,rules

Come to the dark side?

2007-11-08T12:36:00.001-06:00

I like Fred, but he reminds me a bit of Emperor Palpatine in this picture.

Technorati Tags: Election 2008,Fred Thompson,Palpatine

And he sings!

2007-11-04T17:41:00.000-06:00

My brother takes "voice" from some folks in Alamo, TN. They have two annual shows -- one in the summer and one at Christmas. This year, Samuel's solo was "The Music of the Night" from the Phantom of the Opera. He was amazing... Here are a few clips.

And his group...

A smoking pile of rubble

2007-10-25T00:57:00.000-05:00

In the total loss of building use scenario, what likely exists will be a smoking pile of rubble. This rubble will contain many components that could be dangerous. It could also contain any personnel on the premises at the time of the disaster. For these reasons, the local fire marshal with the assistance of the police will control the site until the building is no longer a threat to surrounding properties and the companies have secured the site from the general public.

I've been reading the disaster recovery plan for one of our providers. Above is a particularly fun paragraph.

Technorati Tags:disaster recovery, catastrophy, smoking pile of rubble

Breaking news?

2007-10-14T23:48:00.000-05:00

I know that I tend to ramble here. The websites that offer recommendations on blogging say that you should pick a topic and stick to it. Oh well.

On September 24, our little town adopted a new law that may be controversial in some circles. It was on the local television news on October 9, Tuesday of last week (see the previous blog post). It showed up as "Breaking News" on the main local daily newspaper late last week (Friday I think). Their coverage on this breaking news story (almost a month old now) was basically, "City passes ordinance restricting ownership of some dogs." Seriously. It was one line -- on the website. No story followed the next day.

There was a message on my answering machine tonight from a reporter for the local daily newspaper. She left the message at about 7:45 for a news story that will, I guess, run tomorrow. I returned her call just after 10 o'clock. She thanked me for my call but said she'd already filed the story.

I have no idea why this has become an issue now. Further bulletins as events warrant... :)

Not quite a TV star

2007-10-10T17:21:00.000-05:00

The rumors are true. I was on television last night. I don't think I made the best showing, but I'm told I was very serious. Out of about 20 minutes of video I'm on camera like 30 seconds... Oh well.

Technorati Tags:television, pit bull, WBBJ

And they do not like you...

2007-10-03T18:30:00.000-05:00

from "There Will Be No Peace" - W.H. Auden

You must live with your knowledge.
Way back, beyond, outside of you are others,
In moonless absences you never heard of,
Who have certainly heard of you,
Beings of unknown number and gender:
And they do not like you.

Wow. That's dark. Look up the rest of the poem if you're interested. I love W. H. Auden. Not a love poet, certainly, but WOW.

And no, I don't think this poem's about you... be happy!

I'll record the rest of it and post it as a link later.

Uncle Harry tells the "pig story"

2007-09-19T23:42:00.000-05:00

We had a chance to work on a new video the other night. Mr. Harry wanted to share "the pig story" with some of his nieces and nephews... So.. Here's "Story Time with Uncle Harry"

Give Allison credit for the idea, Justin for the soundtrack, and ME for the pig noises.. Mr. Harry did a great job!

Technorati Tags:Video, Story, Pigs

Gabba Gabba GOOOOO!

2007-09-16T17:04:00.000-05:00

The Pentecostal Church and The Holy Ghost Want You To Wear Pig Panties � Violent Acres:

"Not only were we surrounded by friends, but at any second, there was a distinct possibility that someone would become possessed by the good ol’ Holy Ghost and feel compelled to shout at the ceiling, “GABBA GABBA GOOOOO!”"

I'm fascinated by "spirit filled churches". I do believe that the Spirit manifests itself in different ways in different people and different communities of faith -- it's a fact that we don't speak in tongues or fall under the spirit very often in our small-town Methodist Church. I'm told that it happens in other local churches.

The above account (and I recommend reading the entire post) is hilarious and also informative. I've not read such a frank account of life in a Pentecostal church before.

Enjoy!

Technorati Tags:Pentecostal Church, Religion, Spirituality, Interesting

Breathe

2007-09-16T16:58:00.000-05:00

I have allowed you to
Place me in a little box
So small, I can hardly
Breathe.

I do not like it in the box
It is small and
I like to
Breathe.

So you sit there
On the box
Talking at me
Not to me, as if nothing is
Amiss.

I will allow you to leave
If you will
So I can leave this little box and
Breathe.

She just lay down to sleep...

2007-09-05T21:32:00.003-05:00

Goodbye.

Technorati Tags:pet, dog, death, German Shepherd

Memphis music

2007-09-04T23:19:00.000-05:00

I spent the weekend at the Memphis Music and Heritage Festival in and around the Center for Southern Folklore on Main Street in Memphis. This is an annual event for me -- I think this is my ninth festival. I've been working for and with the Center since 1997.

It's truly an amazing event put together almost entirely by volunteers. The Music and Heritage Festival is the largest free heritage festival of its kind in the Southeast, I think. Yeah, I said FREE. More than 100 acts played over two days. Everything from Choctaw Dancers to Klezmer to the Bobby Rush himself made this years festival a HUGE success.

I am more and more amazed every year with Judy Peiser, the Center's Executive Director, particularly. She seems to have boundless energy and a boundless drive to promote ALL facets of culture represented in the South at the Festival. Judy is simply amazing.

As I say, I've worked with the Center for Southern Folklore for the last decade or so -- I've met hundreds of musicians, artists, and entertainment professionals. I've shook hands with B.B. King (and served him dinner) several times, I've spent quality time with Marty Stuart and the late Rufus Thomas, I've spent hours with record producers, concert promoters, painters, sculptors, and who knows who else. I've never gotten a picture with any of them. I'm an idiot -- in many cases, I was ALONE with these folks. I never thought it was proper or my place to be a fan; I wanted to do my job and make these people comfortable. I've decided to change my outlook slightly: Yes, I'll continue to do my job and support these folks in whatever professional way that I can, but I'm also gonna get PICTURES.

I have a hodge-podge of responsibilities at the Music and Heritage Festival. Primarily, I'm nominally over the operations of the bar and food service area inside what is known as "Folklore Hall". I'm a problem solver, too, fixing problems and putting out fires that may crop up in and near the venue for which I'm responsible. I'm also responsible for making sure the artists get paid. Yeah, I get to hand out the checks -- and that puts me directly in front of the performers.

That's really one of the greatest parts of my job at the festival: I get to meet and greet every performer. Many of the "regulars" know my name; almost all of them know my face by now. Many begin smiling when they see me, call my name, or just generally seem glad to see me. I'd be glad to see me, too, of course, as I have their check! This year, I got several pictures with some of my favorite artists; unfortunately, I *still* missed a few of my favorites.

I did manage to get pictures with two of my primary targets, however: Eddie Bond and Kate Campbell. Of course, in all the pictures, I look like someone's been beating me with a club and the performers look like they've been drenched -- it was hot in Memphis this last weekend (even inside it was warm under the stage lights).

I had a great time -- even though my feet and knees are just now getting back to normal. I can't wait for next year.

For more information on the Center for Southern Folklore, visit http://www.southernfolklore.com. There's also a special web-page for the festival at http://www.memphismusicandheritage festival.com.

I recommend reading Andria Lisle's excellent article on the festival in the Memphis Flyer (click).

Also, Tom Bremer wrote a nice blurb on Kate Campbell (click) in his reflections on this years festival.

Technorati Tags:Center for Southern Folklore, Memphis Music and Heritage Festival, Memphis, Music

A little Hank Williams: "You Win Again"

2007-08-23T00:07:00.001-05:00

As you may know, I’ve been playing around with an Autoharp for several months. At the same time, I’ve fallen in love with Hank Williams, Sr. He recorded lots of music. His themes seem to be confined basically to:

Lost, Unrequited, or Spurned Love
His Mother Dying
Gospel Music

I’ve played a few gospel numbers for various church and community gatherings. I’ve not had a chance to play anything else, really. I recorded myself playing “You Win Again” tonight. It’s not terribly bad, I think, but I’m not a professional . You can have a look at the lyrics by visiting the LyricWiki page for “You Win Again”.

You can have a listen to my version here:

So, I think I don’t need to be on the road. Still, it was fun! What do you think of Hank Williams or my rendition of his song/

Technorati Tags:Hank Williams, Autoharp, Recording, You Win Again

Lucky letters? Ha!

2007-08-18T17:40:00.000-05:00

Last night I was talking to a friend of mine and, knowing my penchant for crossword puzzles, she recommended I try Pat Sajak's "Lucky Letters" online game. It looked pretty neat. Pat Sajak was explaining to me the rules and then he offered my first slate of "Lucky Letters". The image to the right is a screen shot showing the letters I had to choose from. Click the image to enlarge -- I've highlighted the relevant part.

Now, I would like to believe that this was a completely random occurrence. I don't know, really. Perhaps some programmer some where was having a good time -- or perhaps some programmer somewhere forgot to put a filter in. Nevertheless, I laughed. My friend laughed (when I sent her the screenshot).

So, should I send this to the game people? What do you think about my "Lucky Letters"?

Technorati Tags:Pat Sajak, Lucky Letters, Flash Games, FUCK, Funny, Screenshot

Leading birth control 1930 to 1960: Lysol?

2007-08-17T18:43:00.000-05:00

Lysol (cleaner) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:

"In the US, from around 1930 to 1960, vaginal douching with a Lysol disinfectant solution was the most popular form of birth control. US marketing ads printed testimonials from European 'doctors' touting its safety and effectiveness."

Wow. I like Lysol -- it makes my house feel clean. But BIRTH CONTROL? I never knew this. It's so bizzare!!! How in the world did someone decide that was a good idea? What woman would use Lysol in such a way? Wow.

Technorati Tags:lysol, birth control, bizzare, wikipedia

Plum tuckered out...

2007-08-16T00:42:00.000-05:00

The heat is getting to me. The drought is getting to me. Life is getting to me.

I need a vacation and so I will have one. The waves breaking, the sand between my toes, the fish in my belly... Destin, here I come.

I will celebrate my birthday on the sugar-fine sand beaches of the Emerald Coast. If you're gonna be around Destin the week of August 27, let me know!

My father is somewhat upset, however, that I will miss HIS birthday while I'm gone. In retribution, he's making plans to attend B.B. King's concert in Tunica. That's almost enough to make me stay -- but not quite. He also claims that he's going to play golf -- again, to see my father in the heat of summer on the golf course is almost enough to keep me in our small town. My mother tactfully asked him how many holes he plans to play. My father replied, "All of them!" "How many days will that take?" my mother asked... He responded with a scowl.

Loving your neighbor

2007-08-08T22:33:00.000-05:00

Justin asked a question on his Facebook a couple days ago, "What one thing have you learned today?"

I answered that question: "The way we treat the people we like the least is the best measure of our character."

If you're a Christian, you've probably heard Jesus' take on this issue: "Love your neighbor as yourself," and "Whatever you do unto the least of these you do also unto Me."

That second suggestion is really only relevant if you're a Christian and believe in putting Jesus/God first, of course. There's also the Golden Rule, "Do unto other as you would have them do unto you."

I dunno. I've been reminded lately, both at work and in my personal life, that we need to treat everyone with the love and respect that we hope to receive. Just because we *can* treat someone like crap doesn't mean we should -- even if there are no consequences (but you know, there are consequences and repercussions to every action). Just because we are set above someone or hold some power over them doesn't mean we should use it, it doesn't mean we should take the opportunity to demean or degrade them.

One of the most innocent and truly good and simple people I know in this world (other than Samuel) has been seriously abused this last few weeks by someone in authority over them. It's not fair, it's not right, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. It breaks my heart, it makes me want to weep, but I'm powerless here (I think). I keep thinking time will make this just "go away", but this abuse, this demeaning condescending attitude that's directed toward this simple and good person keeps rearing its ugly head. I want to fix everything, but I can't -- I know, I know.

How sweet... wait.. easy girls?

2007-08-06T23:50:00.000-05:00

I found this image on the web this evening and thought it was terribly sweet. What a wonderful visual poem addressing how the "best" and "good" girls are harder to reach. It explains why "good" girls may be waiting... And then... I read it again...

Does this mean that those girls I've pursued who've chosen assholes and dipsh*ts (instead of me, the perfect man) have been "easy" and "rotten"? I don't know whether to be relieved or disturbed. What does this say about me?

Technorati Tags:women, bad apples, good, relationships

Import a Skunk? 30 days and $50

2007-08-05T23:58:00.000-05:00

70-4-208. Unlawful importation of skunks — Penalty. —

(a) It is unlawful for any person to import, possess, or cause to be imported into this state any type of live skunk, or to sell, barter, exchange or otherwise transfer any live skunk, except that the prohibitions of this section shall not apply to bona fide zoological parks and research institutions.

(b) A violation of this section is a Class C misdemeanor.

[Acts 1974, ch. 622, § 1; 1982, ch. 738, § 31; T.C.A., § 51-514; Acts 1989, ch. 591, § 113.]

A Class C misdemeanor in Tennessee is punishable by "not greater than 30 days in jail and a fine not to exceed $50".

HELP HELP, I'M BEING REPRESSED!!!!

Why in the world can't I import a skunk into the great state of Tennessee? What if I just lure a skunk into the state -- say with some peanut butter or something? I can see the headline now: "Local alderman jailed for transporting pole-cat across state lines"...

I thought this was hilarious when I found it the other day while searching for animal cruelty laws. "Seriously," I thought, "why would it matter?" Apparently, skunks are common carriers of rabies and our General Assembly in its wisdom decided to outlaw the importation of this dangerous feline. I hope they didn't spend long on this law.

Technorati Tags:skunk, Tennessee, dumb laws

The day turned dark

2007-08-03T00:00:00.001-05:00

I’ve been dealing with some pretty serious crap lately (literally). I won’t elaborate, but it suffices to say that I’ve been stressed. Don’t fret about me though, I’ll be okay. It’s not bad stress, just lots of it. I’ve been pretty much at peace lately. Hoo rah.

My day had been full yesterday. I’d worked at my desk much of the day, trying to finish projects that never seem to get finished. Trying to empty my “in” box even as Judy was shoving more stuff on top. The end of the day came and I was tired.

I find myself sitting on my couch just after 5:00 and the phone rang. It was Justin and he asked me where I was. His tone was curt and cold and I wondered what was wrong. “It’s distinctly possible I’ve pissed him off,” I think to myself. I’d talked to him earlier in the day, but one never knows. I screw up all the time.

No. Justin wasn’t mad at me. He was calling to tell me that a student at Gibson County High School had collapsed on the field during football practice. They’d rushed him to the hospital but he’d been unresponsive and in fact had passed away just minutes before Justin called.

As Justin told me this, matter-of-factly, as he told me who it was, I was shocked. I was amazed. I didn’t weep or cry. I said, “Oh God”. That was pretty much it.

The day turned dark.

This young man was the younger, baby brother of a guy, John, who graduated from High School with me. He was almost exactly a year younger than Samuel. John and I had baby brothers at the same time. I remember offering him advice when his brother was born; babies were new things to 8^th graders.

I called my parents last night. My father said nothing for a few moments and then quietly told my mother. Over the telephone I could hear her sobs. I told my father to take care of my mother and that I’d be over shortly.

I won’t laud the young man, though he probably deserves it. He was a good kid; a genuinely good kid, so far as I know. I was always pleased to see him.

I am reminded that life can change in a moment. We can be snatched away from our loved ones in the blink of an eye. They can be snatched away from us in an instant. Death is no respecter of age, health, position, power, or wealth. We must cherish our friends and family. We must love them and let them know we love them. We must love and accept love.

Nose hair and the men who have it...

2007-07-26T00:36:00.001-05:00

I spent the day with a young guy who’s studying to be an engineer. That’s not really relevant except that it might explain why he doesn’t care about his nose hair. It’s possible that he just doesn’t notice; engineers are a rare breed.

This guy’s nasal hair is AMAZING! It’s like a little spider or something sitting on each side of his nostril. I can’t imagine breathing with something like that growing out of my breathing holes. Surely he can feel it; surely it interferes with his eating! I won’t say it’s disgusting, but it’s certainly distracting. I can’t look at him without staring at his nose. Dark black wiry hair.

Of course, he also has a scraggly, unkempt beard. I don’t know what’s going on — even when I had a beard, it was either really scruffy (but full) or neatly trimmed. His beard doesn’t look good scruffy ‘cause it’s not thick enough. Again, dark black wiry hair.

I’ve only recently had to become concerned about nose hair. Patrick, my former roommate, grew a forest if he didn’t keep it trimmed. Tori and Allison even gave him a trimmer especially for his nose a few Christmases ago. I had no such worries; I still don’t worry much. I only get the occasional straggler that is quickly plucked out.

If you see a little friend, a blondish tendril, peaking out of my nose, please let me know. I don’t want to be the object of conversation.

Technorati Tags:nose hair, grooming, appearance

How the bestsellers end...

2007-07-22T15:11:00.001-05:00

It seems bestsellers always end up with someone (or several people) dying. It’s true for Harry Potter, certainly. I’ll not spoil it — my friend Matt’s already been cursing me ‘cause I inadvertently gave up some plot details.

Now, I’ll not tell you how it ends, but you’ll be surprised and pleased, I think. I managed to snag a copy and I’ve read the highlights… you need to either read the book or wait for the move (which is sure to be a block-buster).

I will, however, fill you in on the details of another bestseller. Yeah, Jesus dies. But he comes back. Don’t mean to spoil it for you, but if you’ve missed that, you’re kinda out of touch anyway.

Before you get to bitching about my comparing the Bible and Harry Potter think for a moment: More people will read Harry Potter cover-to-cover this year than will read the Bible (perhaps at all). I’m not kidding and you know I’m right.

I just finished an excellent biography of Winston Churchill by Roy Jenkins that included more than 1000 pages of small print. If I can read this thing cover-to-cover, why not the Bible? I dunno; I’ve a flawed character — even though I’m the perfect man.

Technorati Tags:Harry Potter, Jesus, Bible, Spoiler

I was a 4 year old pageant king

2007-07-20T00:32:00.001-05:00

No, I wasn’t a 4 year old pageant king, but I know kids who were. Though I’m not sure I agree with the practice, I can see little girls in beauty pageants; not so little boys. Can you imagine facing the bullies at pre-school? It can’t be good for one’s self image: If you win, you think you’re amazing, if you lose, you think you suck. Tweenage boys don’t need to reflect on their life on the pageant circuit; they’ve got enough trouble with emerging hormones and blossoming sexuality.

I’ll confess, I’ve been to beauty pageants. Hell, I’ve JUDGED a beauty pageant. I judged little toddling boys, too, I’ll tell you. It was tough and I thought they should all get a trophy, a sharp pointed trophy they could use to attack their mothers when they’re old enough to figure out that their mothers started their sissification far too young. I was hoping one of them would bite his mother but alas, no.

I dunno. My friend Liz was in a pageant a last year I think. It was a small, local thing and she won. She got to ride in a parade and preside over the opening ceremonies of several community events. She also got to sell t-shirts at a “memorabilia stand”.

For those of you interested in the pageant life, I refer you to the excellent movie, Drop Dead Gorgeous. While satirical, it highlights some of the sillier aspects of pageantry.

Technorati Tags:beauty pageants , children, abuse

The "Toot-N-Tell-It" effect -- at an end?

2007-07-18T23:18:00.001-05:00

Toot N Tell It
Originally uploaded by Mrs Soop.

The Daily Beacon

The Tennessee General Assembly recently passed anti-smoking legislation that will prohibit smoking in public places effective Oct. 1.

The Senate version of the bill was among the strictest in the country, banning smoking in any enclosed public area, until the Tennessee House of Representatives added several exemptions to the ban, excusing age-restricted venues, private clubs and smoking rooms in hotels, among others.

I had lunch at Joe and Deanna's with my dad today. I noticed a sign on the door that said, "State Law: Effective October 27 we will be a non-smoking establishment." It was a hand-lettered sign and I was pleased to see that they spelled all the word correctly.

This got me to thinking about our other eatery in Dyer: the "Toot-N-Tell-It". For as long as I've can remember (even before they moved) people have talked about the "Toot-N-Tell-It effect" or the "Toot-N-Tell-It scours". It's a certain laxative effect that one experiences upon dining at said establishment. It's not the food, I guarantee, for if you get take out or have catered food, you don't experience that special feeling.

I surmise that the effect is generated by vaporized grease, cigarette smoke, and something else undefined (perhaps burnt hair or something). It's special, the odor one carries on one's person when one leaves the Toot. People KNOW you've been there -- and you know you've been there after about an hour because of the special rumbling down below.

I am eagerly waiting to see if the removal of cigarette smoke from the equation leads to a lessening of "the effect". We shall see. Let me know what you think!

Technorati Tags:Toot N Tell It, Dyer, TN, smoking ban, Tennessee

Nice guys finish last... a rant

2007-07-16T12:19:00.000-05:00

I was listening earlier today to Green Day's song "Nice Guys Finish Last". It's not really about the "nice guy" as I think about it, but it did get me thinking.

I am the classic "nice guy". Fu-Zu Jen wrote an interesting "tribute" to nice guys for the Wharton Undergraduate Journal that accurately characterizes nice guys. You should read it. It's not terribly long. It's some stuff I've not thought about.

She says, in part:

The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.
...
This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

I've quoted far too much of her writing, but it's dead-on. Nice guys get screwed -- and not in the good way. Nice guys end up with women who use and abuse them, who leave them standing on the side of the road wondering what the hell ever happened.

The problem with nice guys, according to the heartless bitches at Heartless Bitches International is, "... that Nice Guys don't like themselves." I don't think that's true, at least for all the nice guys I know. I like myself just fine; I'm caring, passionate, confident (most of the time), successful.

I'm sick and tired of being the perfect man, of being the person that women compare their exes too when they're explaining why it doesn't work out ("Yeah, Nathan, he's not like you... You never treat me like that... Bubba and I didn't communicate like you and I do, Nathan.") I'm sick and tired of it, but I don't know what to do about it.

I make the mistake of trying to be friends. Excuse the f'ing sh*t out of me, but doesn't it make sense to see if you can tolerate or stand a person before you try to jump into some relationship with them? Except it rarely works that way: When a woman finds out who you are (this wonderful person), they end up wanting to STAY friends. I understand that I am not attracted to every woman I befriend; I understand that every woman isn't attracted to me, but DAMN, it seems like once you become a FRIEND, the freaking door is slammed shut and the key is melted down. Why does it have to be that way? Why don't nice guys ever get a chance?

Women SAY they want a nice guy, but NICE GUYS are like Amos Hart from the musical Chicago:

Cellophane
Mister Cellophane
Shoulda been my name
Mister Cellophane
'Cause you can look right through me
Walk right by me
And never know I'm there...

Yeah, Nice Guys are like Amos -- Mr. Cellophane -- you look right through us, walk right past us all the while saying you're looking for someone just like us... But that's not what women want -- at least not until they've grown and learned... and still maybe never.

There's little to be done about, it seems. The world needs nice guys and we're a happy lot, for the most part. Nice guys make the world go 'round. You need us to cry on, to call on, to support you when you're not sure of yourself. We'll just keep being nice and taking the small slights and bearing the little pains silently.

Now, before I get a torrent of flaming hate-mail scented with womens perfume, I know that I have been the "nice guy" to some of you reading this. Yeah, I know you read my blog -- you've told me. You've even told me how sweet it is sometimes, the stuff I write about you and other women. I'm not gonna stop being your nice guy; it's who I am and you know I can't change. I just thought I needed to get this off my chest... I don't mean to offend, but LISTEN, for whatever good it will do.

Technorati Tags:nice guys, relationships, romance, rant

How other people deal with door-to-door idiots...

2007-07-13T23:41:00.000-05:00

I read the best of Craigslist occasionally. Funny stuff, sometimes. I came across particularly funny post tonight that I identify with:

best of craigslist : Door to door religious idiots:

"Still out of breath from the fight, sweating, covered in scratches and blood and hair, and carrying a nail trimming tool in one hand, I fling open the door. The picture-perfect charismatic family has decided to let the little girl be the front man. She looks to be about eight years old. She's standing on the front porch, while Mom, Dad, and Little Brother - about five - are standing a few feet back on the walkway. I grit my teeth in my best Dirty Harry impression, look directly at the little girl, and say, 'Yes?' "

I wrote about my own manner of dealing with random people ringing my bell a few months ago. Perhaps I should get some fake blood.

Protestant churches aren't "churches"?

2007-07-10T18:08:00.001-05:00

Vatican: Non-Catholics 'wounded' by not recognizing pope - CNN.com

"Despite the fact that this teaching has created no little distress ... it is nevertheless difficult to see how the title of 'Church' could possibly be attributed to them,"
...
The document said the Council's opening to other faiths recognized there were "many elements of sanctification and truth" in other Christian denominations, but stressed only Catholicism had all the elements to be Christ's Church fully.

Wow. I have great respect for the Roman Catholic church and its role in the history of faith and its role in contemporary evangelism... BUT... how short-sighted, how narrow-minded, how amazingly dumb public relations.

Yes, I know that Vatican II had quite a bit to say about "other" churches, but it was vague and handy -- at least we could imagine that there were other "windows" to faith. This is out-and-out condemnation of Protestantism.

Technorati Tags: Vatican, Protestant Churches, religion, news, rediculous

The price of freedom

2007-07-03T00:32:00.000-05:00

Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty.
--John F. Kennedy, Inaugural Address 1961

I went to the patriotic cantata presented by our local community choir Sunday afternoon. It was well done; we're blessed with talent in our little community. I wish I could have participated this year, but I simply didn't have the time or the emotional fortitude to devote to several months of practice.

One of the songs they sang was "The Price of Freedom". It's a touching song about how, throughout history, men have given their lives for freedom. Throughout the song, they showed slides of local servicemen from World War I to the present. I'll be honest: I got choked up looking at some of the faces. Some were killed in action, some have returned to our community, and some are serving NOW. I was stuck by how many of the faces I know personally and even how many are of "my generation".

Off the top of my head, here are the folks I can think of who are or will serve our country "from my generation": Tom M., John O., Katie M., Jonathan F., Brandon B., Nathan G., and I know there are others. Who did I forget? Tell me!

I will not debate the rightness of the conflicts in which our nation is currently engaged. It is enough to say that we are fighting for liberty in parts of the world where liberty may be sorely lacking. It is enough to say that the folks I listed above are fighting in our names for the ideals of freedom and liberty that we must embrace if we call ourselves Americans.

Let's give thanks, as we approach Independence Day, for those who have been willing to risk the ultimate sacrifice to preserve our way of life, to uphold the ideals of freedom and liberty that America represents.

Happy July 4.

Technorati Tags:freedom, liberty, sacrifice, America, Independence Day, July 4

Justin describes the tornado

2007-07-02T22:32:00.000-05:00

Justin describes the tornado -- using sound effects, role-play, flashbacks, and interpretative dance.

We have far too much time on our hands.

Technorati Tags:funny, tornado, role-play

Consequences and Repercussions

2007-07-02T17:52:00.000-05:00

Choices are interesting things. We choose what to eat, we choose where to go, where to live, who to hang out with, what to wear, what to watch on television. We make hundreds of choices every day, certainly.

Choices have consequences and repercussions.

We often analyze our what we consider *big* choices and weigh the "pros and cons". We often do not analyze "every day" choices -- we just decide and move on.

What I forget is that ALL choices have consequences and repercussions. I may choose what I believe is the right thing for me and, if I choose correctly, the outcome will be largely positive. Regardless, all choices have consequences and repercussions -- sometimes these consequences and repercussions may be unpleasant or disagreeable to me.

You, too, have made choices which were likely the right choices for you, but those choices have consequences and repercussions which may have been disagreeable. Think for a moment on choices you've made, perhaps without considering the total outcome. Are you satisfied with the results? Do the pros outweigh the cons?

Some choices can be made over. Some cannot. We must be prepared to live with the consequences of our choices.

Choices involving people are the hardest to make again. Take, for example, "first impressions": we're told you only get one chance to make a good first impression. People make choices, judgments about us based on their impressions of us. It's hard, for me, to overcome my first impression of someone.

People are unpredictable. When our choices involve people, we cannot often accurately gauge their response our their subsequent behavior. I very infrequently make "final" choices about people. My friends say I sit on the fence about too many things, but I think, as concerns people, you can't sit on the fence enough. Taking extreme, precipitate action which binds you to someone or alienates you from someone is a serious choice and should be considered carefully. I don't, generally, make such choices (though sometimes they're made for me). I'd rather wait, keep my cards close to my vest, and see how things develop. I think I'm happier that way and I hopefully (certainly?) make few enemies.

With few exceptions choices, while not entirely reversible, can be "fixed". I can choose to never eat a hotdog with jalapeños again (and save my poor digestive system), I can choose to always buckle my seat belt after a car accident, I can choose to divorce my wife or husband (not pleasant, but it is a "fix"), I can choose to forgive someone for something perceived as "unforgivable", I can choose to always drink gin and never drink tequila, I can choose to always fly from Nashville and never from Memphis, I can give people second chances and I can accept second chances from others.

Technorati Tags:choices, consequences, repercussions, decisions

Religious WHAT?

2007-06-21T22:40:00.001-05:00

desire
Originally uploaded by lapeet1.

I had a conversation with a customer today that left me speechless for a few moments. You're probably surprised. You'll understand in a moment.

We were talking, catching up as it were, doing the thing where I act interested in his family and so forth. I asked him about his daughter (she's HAWT, by the way) who's currently enrolled at a super-selective private university.

"Yeah, she's doing great. She started out studying public policy, but now she's really into religious sex."

Huh? I didn't say anything for several moments. Usually there is a lively banter between the customer and me. The silence stretched on... and on.

I gathered my wits, "So, John, how 'bout that expansion module you guys had talked about? Still hiring some more folks this fall? You'll need the capacity."

Yeah. He shocked me. Until I realized that he had said "SECTS" not "SEX".

I called him back after about an hour to clarify. We had a good laugh and then he explained. She's studying modern religious ideologies, I think, or something. Much less interesting than... well, you know.

Technorati Tags:religious sex, religious sects, sects, homonyms

"Adult" book stores

2007-06-17T18:15:00.000-05:00

nashvilleX3
Originally uploaded by ihaveabuginmyeye.

I confess, I've been in an adult book store. I was disappointed. They not one copy of War and Peace, The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire, Pride and Prejudice, Silas Marner, or even Gone with the Wind. They did have some interesting titles though.

Seriously. "Adult Book Store" is a bad name for what these places are, I think. "Adult Books" conjures in my mind an image of a slightly cluttered, dusty bookshop full of heavy tomes with weighty titles. I don't know what a better euphemism would be, though. It still should be something innocuous sounding -- maybe something like "Porn Store" or "Filthy Book Palace". Would those be clear enough?

Tori and Jeff and I were at the lake one weekend and had passed the book place a few times on our way back and forth. Tori suggested that we might stop -- that it might be interesting. Now, I hate to pass judgement on an entire industry based on one experience, but this place was CREEPY. Perhaps "stores" in Memphis would be more up-scale and less trashy, but this place, outside of Paris, was plain skank. The decor wasn't all that horrible -- it had a crummy-video-store kind of feel which doesn't bother me since I'm from a small town with no chain video stores (all our video stores are crummy), but the clientèle just FREAKED me... Granted, we didn't look like the a million bucks (we'd been on the lake part of the day and had showered, but not "fixed ourselves up" to go out), but some of the folks hanging out in this establishment looked as if they'd climbed from under a rock somewhere.

Anyway, we wandered in, were warmly greeted by the proprietress, and proceeded to look around. I was particularly fascinated by the "Toy" section. Tori kept telling me not to touch anything -- but I couldn't help myself. There, sitting on a shelf available to the whole world (or at least the part of the world willing to stop at such a distinctive establishment), was the molded silicon replica of some woman's (a famous "star" of the adult film industry, no doubt) nether regions. I picked a safe place to poke my finger -- a thigh, I think -- and was amazed at the texture. Didn't feel like any woman I'd ever poked. I guess, if you're buying silicon woman parts, authenticity isn't that big of a thing -- after all, if you NEED silicon woman parts, you likely don't have a real woman with which to compare it.

We didn't buy anything. If they'd had a T-Shirt, I might have bought one... I was gonna ask about souvenir t-shirts of key-chains, but Tori wouldn't let me.

We smiled politely, thanked the lady for letting us look around, and leaped into the car leaving a cloud of dust and thrown gravel hoping that no one from home (especially the preacher) recognized our car.

Technorati Tags:Adult Book Store, Porn, Stories, Travel, Interesting

Schoolhouse Rockin' Aunt Rete

2007-06-17T18:00:00.000-05:00

Aunt Rete is a regular guest at our house for Sunday lunch. We have a fairly traditional lunch almost every Sunday -- Dad cooks, we sit around the table for an hour or so, and then progress into the den for more conversation.

Somehow, today, we got off on the subject of old cartoon. We talked about the Gummi Bears, Garfield, Fraggle Rock, and others. Samuel, trying to add something to the conversation, asked about Schoolhouse Rock -- he'd learned a few songs for something he did at school (a skit or some-such). He started demonstrating while sitting next to Aunt Rete. She didn't seem amused.

Don't tell Sam this is up here -- he'd be embarrassed.

Technorati Tags:Fraggle Rock, Schoolhouse Rock, Video, Sunday Dinner

Saying "I Love You"

2007-06-09T14:56:00.000-05:00

"Death is a challenge. It tells us not to waste time... It tells us to tell each other right now that we love each other."
-Leo F. Buscaglia

I love. I love earnestly, deeply, tenderly, and without any expectations of reward. I love easily. The way that I love has caused me some heartache and heartbreak over the years, but on the whole, I think I'm happier.

Those of you who know me, my friends, know that I often (more often than not) end a conversation saying, "I love you." For some of you this has been off-putting at times. I have a certain "macho" friend who literally freaked the first time I told him that I loved him. I backed off a bit and didn't try it again for a while. Several months later he said to me, "Nathan, do you love me?" "Of course," I told him. "I love you too," he said. He almost always tells me that he loves me now -- he'll beat me to the punch on the phone.

I love. And I want you to know that I love you. To live in this world, today, in a time that is uncertain in so many ways (and I'm not even talking about eschatologically uncertain times), it is important to let people know that we love them. Yes, I love all people generally -- that's why it's so easy for me to rationalize bad behavior in others, to let personal slights and insults go, to accept people as they are, but I also love people specifically. Like family.

I have friends that I call "brother" or "sister". If I could pick my family, these people would be it. You know the kind of relationship I'm talking about. These are the people I wouldn't want or choose to live without; these are the people who keep me sane and keep me grounded. It's a short list, but I think I have more of these kinds of relationships than most. I talk to some people about their closest friends and I have discovered that many people don't have the kind of relationships I describe with ANYONE. I pity them. Who can read their minds and their souls? Who can hear their voice and immediately detect joy or heartache even when they're trying to hide it?

We need close friendships. We need love in our lives -- and not the EROS, bum-chica-wow-wow kind. Sure, there's a place for that -- a big place -- but that kind of love does not sustain us, that kind of love doesn't last (it comes in waves, even in committed relationships). For many people, married or committed people, their closest friend is their spouse or partner. That's not inappropriate -- in fact, it makes live a joy. To love, on multiple levels, the person you're spending your life with is a gift.

If a man should importune me to give a reason why I loved him, I find it could no otherwise be expressed, than by making answer: because it was he, because it was I.
- Michel de Montaigne

I try to love, we should try to love, without any expectations. That's a hard thing to grasp for some people. So many relationships (what some people might call "friendships" but I'll prefer to call "acquaintance") are based on mutual benefit. You give, I give, we both get something. That's fine, but it puts an invisible burden on a relationship. We should love purely, without expectation of reward or benefit. This is hard, yes, but in the end, if you're disappointed in a friend, you can say to yourself, "I love this person; I shouldn't expect anything of them but love in return."

More generally, we should love EVERYONE without expectation. The man on the street, the asshole who cuts you off in traffic, the dipsh*t that won't shut up in the elevator (and he's there every day)... When we decide to love people, all people, we let anger slough off of our souls like a second skin and I promise that we're happier. Some of you have heard me say, "I'm not angry, I'm disappointed." That sounds like something a parent would say, but it's the truth in my case (most of the time). I am more often disappointed than I am angry -- and disappointment is not a sin in any religion that I can find. Anger is an emotion; disappointment is a learning experience.

I love tenderly. I'm a soft-hearted kind of guy. When those I love hurt, I hurt. When they are disappointed in life, I find myself disappointed. Sympathy? Empathy? I dunno, but, that's what love SHOULD be. When we love, our hearts resonate with the songs in the hearts of others. I'm supposedly easy to read. A friend told me recently (on several occasions) that she can "read my face like a book". I don't know about that -- she didn't do so well if you ask me -- but it's true that those who know me well (perhaps those who love me?) *can* hear in my voice, see in my face, observe in my behavior my TRUE mood (and not the one I'm projecting to the general public). Tender love is gentle and caring, not pushy and abrasive. Tender love caresses our hurts and cheers our joys.

I love easily and readily. More than two years ago, I was reintroduced to a young woman who I'd met several months before. She went with me and some friends to eat and then to hang out. When we dropped her off at her apartment, I got out to walk her to the walk (I didn't go to the door). She thanked me for the invitation and I hugged her -- I stepped back, looked into her eyes, kissed her forehead and said, "I love you." She looked at me strangely, with a slight grin on her face, and blushed. I meant it -- right then. I'd spent several hours with her, only several hours, and I realized in that time that *this* was one of the most important people I'd ever meet in my life. This was not a false revelation. She has become a true friend, one of the people I'm closest to in the world.

We should be ready to love. We should be open to love. If I had sent out applications for "best friends", I doubt I would have picked the young woman above. If I had not been ready to love, easily and readily, I might not have recognized her value and worth. As it was, I was ready, our hearts were open, and most amazingly, they resonate now, almost two years later on the same frequency, they sing different parts of the same song.

So... I say, "I love you." I mean it. I say it often, but it doesn't mean less -- it means more. I am not afraid to love; I am not afraid to admit I love. I fear a future without love; I fear a future without my friends.

Receive love with an open heart. Tell people you love them. Love without expectation, deeply, tenderly, earnestly, purely, simply.

Technorati Tags:love, friendship, relationships, sappy

Come on, ring that bell

2007-06-03T20:22:00.000-05:00

The only people who ever ring my doorbell are the police, evangelists, and people selling stuff (I guess evangelists are sort of selling stuff). I don't like it. I don't like company. I don't like people "dropping by" or any of that mess. I'm single and male. My house is a wreck. It's not a bio-hazard; I trash food scraps, etc, but there's mail everywhere, books piled up waist high, no room on my couch, etc.

When the bell rings early Saturday morning, I assume it's the police delivering a "package". I get a packet from City Hall every two weeks with reports, agendas, and so forth. I don't normally bother dressing for the police: I just scamper down the hall and throw open the door. The officer gets the pleasure of seeing me in all my unclothed glory. If I'm wearing skimpy underclothes and I'm feeling charitable, I might throw on a pair of "sleeping shorts".

I've found that answering the door nearly naked discourages evangelists from returning. I'm guessing they have a list somewhere and I'm on it: Single/Male, answers door naked, crazed expression

My hair is generally nuts in the morning. To the left is an illustrative picture of how I look when I'm first woken up. It was taken in 2004, but except for no beard and less hair on my head, it's pretty much dead-on. I look like a nearly naked drug-crazed maniac. To enhance the effect, I generally smile broadly when I see new people and giggle to myself softly the whole time they're plying their Jesus.

The no-clothes-maniac routine works so well, I've started stripping when people ring my bell even in the middle of the day, afternoon, or evening. I quickly wet my hands, muss up my hair, and shuffle to the door. I know I've accomplished my goal when whomever is calling jumps back in horror when I fling open the door and start grinning like a nut. If I could only smell worse...

Several months ago, I went bowling on a Friday night. Had a great time. That Saturday morning I woke up early (heaven knows why), and was milling around the house, dressed in the clothes I'd worn the night before. I SMELLED like I'd spent the night in a strip-joint. Not hard to imagine, really: The bowling alley was filled with smoke and I had perspired in my clothes that night. I heard some folks shuffling around outside and opened the door just as an elderly gentleman with a light-bulb was about to ring the bell.

Evangelists. They must not have gotten the memo. He looked shocked at my appearance (even though I was fully clothed, I probably had food stains and I know my hair was a wreck). He and hist little band of proselytizers stepped back when the smell hit them. "Uh, good morning, sir, I'm sorry to have woken you, but I'd like to invite you to our special services this week." Giggling, I replied, "No, you didn't wake me hahahahahah I've been up for HOURS!" He handed me the light-bulb, simultaneously backing away, "Jesus is the light of the world. We'll pray for you." They left rather quickly. I put the bulb in a burned out fixture in my den.

Technorati Tags:evangelists, waking up, scary, morning

Saying "I'm Sorry"

2007-06-03T19:05:00.000-05:00

Never ruin an apology with an excuse. ~Kimberly Johnson

The other week I had a long conversation with a friend of mine who had made a mistake. I don't recall the mistake, but she was heartbroken. She had hurt a friend and didn't know how to fix it. She explained to me the circumstances and kept providing reasons for her actions. I remember stopping her and saying, "Dear, there should be no 'BUT' after 'I'm Sorry'." I could tell she was already rehearsing her apology with me.

Before someone accuses me of twisting facts or thinly veiling my thoughts: I honestly don't remember who she was -- I remember it being a girl. I also don't remember what the mistake was.

I'm really good at apologizing. I've had to be; I make so many mistakes that I get plenty of practice. Often, when someone walks up to me, I begin apologizing immediately. It's safer that way. I'm almost always sure I've done something wrong.

I've learned that the shortest apology is the best: "I'm sorry." Especially with women. Trying to explain one's actions is a sure fire way to make a woman madder.

It's okay to define what you're apologizing for, but be careful. If you say, "I'm sorry for backing over your flowers with my bulldozer," and the person isn't mad about that, but rather, is mad because their pet hamster was in the flowers at the time, you may come off as insensitive. If someone is angry and you're hoping an apology will make it better, be sure why they're angry before you start.

I'll state the obvious: Don't apologize unless you're sincere. Nothing is worse than an insincere apology. If you regret your actions, admit it. If you're not sincere, don't bother opening your mouth, please. Notice, I didn't write, "If you regret the consequences of your actions," above. Apologizing to get what YOU want or to make YOU feel better is a lame-ass reason to apologize. You should apologize simply because you were wrong or because you hurt someone.

Back to the "but" of this story: Seriously, we often take the meat out of an apology by saying "but" after "I'm sorry". Trying to place the blame elsewhere invalidates an apology. To apologize means to admit that YOU have made a mistake -- it's no one's fault but your own. Allow the person you're apologizing to provide an excuse; often times they will when they figure out you're not trying to weasel out of it with a "but" statement. If they don't provide an excuse, don't fret. You've done your part -- you've admitted your mistake and taken responsibility for it. The proper response to an offered apology is to accept it. The proper response to an apology is to forgive.

Technorati Tags:I'm sorry, apology, relationships

None for me, thank you, I'm sucking toads

2007-06-01T00:13:00.001-05:00

Damien Rice - 2879
Originally uploaded by mjecker.

I had a chance to see Damien Rice in concert tonight. I could have seen him from seats in the first few rows, center, at the Orpheum Theater in Memphis.

I knew he was coming to Memphis several months ago and I mentioned to a friend of mine, a concert promoter, that I'd like some good seats. My hope was that she could finagle me some orchestra seats, fairly close, at a good price. She called last week and left me a voicemail: "Hey, I've got you some tickets. Dead center somewhere in the first 10 rows. Call me back." I didn't call her. I knew already that I would be in Conway this week.

I suppose I could have driven from Conway to Memphis tonight, but it would have been irresponsible and a fairly arduous journey. I also knew that I probably couldn't find anyone willing to put up with the hassle of meeting me there under such strange circumstances. Adrienne might have met me, but...

So, Damien is singing in Memphis and I'm in stuck in the home of the Toad Suck Daze Festival. "No, no tickets for me, please, I'm sucking toads in Arkansas." I thought about calling Andrea (my friend with tickets back) with that reply. I thought again and it occurred to me I might need tickets to something else and I shouldn't make a joke of refusing the tickets. Thank you for the offer, Andrea, perhaps next time.

You know when you've found it,
There's something I've learned
'Cause you feel it when they take it away
- "Amie" by Damien Rice

Technorati Tags:Damien Rice, Memphis, Concert, Music

Just a regular roast beef sandwich, please

2007-05-31T23:47:00.000-05:00

I had lunch at Arby's in Conway, Arkansas yesterday. I like beef; I like Arby's. I'm a fan of the roast beef and cheddar sandwich (with bacon, sometimes). I'd had breakfast yesterday, which is unusual, so I wasn't terribly hungry. My plan was simple: Order regular roast beef sandwich, drink bottle of water in van, return to work.

I visited the Arby's -- a brand new facility in a strip mall. My cashier was Ed, a developmentally disabled adult.

Ed: Hello, welcome to Arby's, my name is Edward. People call me Ed. They say Ed is cooler than Edward. Can I take your order?
Me: Yes, thank you Ed, I'd like a regular roast beef sandwich to go, please.
Ed: Yes sir, that'll be a regular roast-beef sandwich. Are you working today? Would you like some fries with that?
Me: Yeah, I'm working today -- right down the road.
Ed: Great! So, that's a regular roast beef sandwich with fries. You wanted curly fries, right? How 'bout a drink? So, are you from out of town?
Me: Yes, I'm from out of town. I've got some water in the van.
Ed: So, that's a large roast-beef combo with curly fries. That's a nice phone -- does it take pictures? Would you like a cherry turnover with your meal?
Me: No, uh, yeah, it's a picture phone. I take lots of pictures.
Ed: Wonderful, that's really neat. So that's a large roast beef combo with curly fries and a cherry turnover. Your total is $7.71.

To summarize: I wanted a regular roast beef sandwich -- that's all. I ended up with a large roast beef sandwich, curly fries, a drink, and a cherry pie/turnover thing.

Someone is teaching Ed the delicate art of up-selling -- and he's learning well.

One might speculate that Ed was exploiting my reluctance to challenge him due to his developmental disability to sell me more food. If that is the case, Ed is pretty sharp. I won't go there.

Technorati Tags:Arby's, developmental disability, Conway, AR, roast beef

Amazing, Amazing, Amazing...

2007-05-29T22:16:00.000-05:00

"Amazing. Amazing. Amazing." That's all I could say tonight as I dined at Mike's Place in Conway, Arkansas. I sent out a broadcast text message to my friends saying just that, "Amazing, it's worth the drive just to eat here." It's four and a half hours from home. I could easily justify that.

The decor is pretty neat; nothing terribly eclectic. Very warm, lots of wood, brick, and some traditional paintings on the walls. There were some romantic niches, and some open banqueting areas. On the whole, the place could best be described as "cavernous". The place is FREAKIN HUGE. I couldn't believe it when I walked inside. They were packed; on a Tuesday night; huge restaurant; barely any tables. They stuck me in a back corner and I was glad to have a chair.

The service was excellent. My waiter, Josh, is 30 years old and is from Conway. He's been working at the restaurant since it opened. The same company that owns Mike's Place is opening another restaurant, more directly Italian themed, and Josh will be the General Manager there, he said. He was attentive, polite, knowledgeable, and stayed out of the way unless I needed something. There were a few times when my water glass became empty and stayed that way longer than I would have liked (I'm a heavy drinker when I eat, you know), but he was serving several tables and it wasn't a big deal. I can't stress enough how confident and excellent the service was.

I had, as an appetizer, their "Shrimp and Cheese Fritters". They surely must have been made in-house. I can't imagine a prepared food company supplying something like that. Amerigo (the chain Italian place) has something similar, but not the same. These were a bit spicy, full of good, smooth cheese, and the shrimp added that "little something extra".

For my main course, Josh recommended that I try a platter -- which allowed me to pick two of the regular entrées (smaller portions) and two of their side dishes which they call "lagniappe". Lagniappe means "an unexpected gift" or a "little more" in Louisiana French. I chose the Crawfish and Shrimp Étouffée and the Blackened Chicken Alfradeaux with Red Peppers. As my sides I had Red Beans and Rice and some Sweet Potato Fries. The Étouffée was excellent -- plenty of flavor and taste, but not too spicy (some people like it spicy, I don't). The pasta was very good, chicken well flavored, good pasta. The beans and rice were also excellent. The Sweet Potato Fries were a bit disappointing, but I didn't know what to expect. It may have been that I was eating highly flavored food and the sweet fries just couldn't compete with the onslaught of other tastes in my mouth. Oh, and the "small portions" were HUGE.

It was obvious that almost none of the food came from a prepared food vendor (or if it did, it was very high quality). It appeared that the dishes had been prepared on site and to exacting standards. The quality of the food, again, was EXCEPTIONAL.

My bill, tax and all, was $26.44.

The only mistake I made today was eating lunch, I couldn't even think about dessert.

I've eaten at some great places; five-star restaurants and holes-in-the-wall. This is far and away the most amazing random restaurant into which I've ever stumbled. It is WORTH THE DRIVE to Conway, Arkansas to eat at Mike's Place. If you can find a play or a concert, go for it, but don't wait -- make some plans now to dine with these guys.

Technorati Tags:Mike's Place, Conway, AR, Arkansas, Food, Dining

"Thinning hair"

2007-05-28T23:46:00.001-05:00

I went to a dinner party a few months ago and noticed in some of the pictures (most of the pictures were embarrassing) that my bald spot is spreading. Yes. I have a receding hairline -- and I think that's sexy an a bit distinguished. The bald spot bothers me. I'm not terribly self-concious about ANYTHING -- you know that, but this isn't the first picture that the spot has jumped out at me.

Probably three years ago -- at the lake -- Tori first pointed out my thinning spot; Patrick and I were comparing hairlines (he's known as "the human forehead" in some circles) and Tori said, "Oooo, look, Nathan's got a bald spot." I thought nothing of it -- it was early in the morning and none of us had showered or primped (we never did on lake mornings). I figured it was just the way my hair was laying that morning. Somewhere in the last few years it's grown.

I asked the lady who cuts my hair about it a few weeks ago -- had she noticed it. "Yes, Nathan, you've always had fine thick hair, but there is a 'weak' spot developing." I asked my Mom about it -- why hadn't she told me, "I thought you knew," she said, "and besides, both your grandfathers were bald by their early thirties." EGAD! Early thirties! Bald Spot! Why didn't someone tell me!!!!!!

I give up
Originally uploaded by churl.

So, I was talking with a friend of mine the other day -- as she was spiking my hair, I think -- and I asked HER about the bald spot. "Yes, Nathan, it's there." She giggled -- not about the bald spot, hopefully, but because she was about to make me look like a punk-wanna-be or something. "What am I to do?" I asked. "You could shave your head -- or get some Rogaine."

Alright. That's an answer I can live with. I like to fix things. If I have a flat tire, I patch it with fix-a-flat or get a new tire. If I have an itch, I put some cream on it. If I have a bald spot, I can smear some foam on it. I mentioned it to my parents, "I'd like some Rogaine (and a tandem bicycle) for my birthday."

Tonight, before I left the house, my mother gave me some Rogaine foam in a sack, "Here son, I got this for you." My cousin Jimmy shared an uplifting joke before I walked out the door:

Son, people say a men whose hair is thinning up front are great THINKERS. You know men whose hair is thinning in back are great LOVERS. If it's thinning in front and in back it means you THINK you're a great LOVER.

He cackled. I smirked. I'm thinning in the back; draw your own conclusions.

I'm going to make my first application to my "warm dry scalp" tonight before bed. I'll let you know.

Technorati Tags:bald spot, Rogaine, thinning hair

Autoharps and "music"

2007-05-28T18:12:00.000-05:00

My cousin James W. Harrison ("Jimmy") brought me an Autoharp a month or two ago. I'd told him that I wanted to learn to play the guitar so he brought TWO guitars and this handy little rhythm instrument made my Oscar Schmidt.

I've not mastered the guitar yet. I'm working on it -- not nearly hard enough, probably. The Autoharp, however, is a dream to play. I think knowing something about music if helpful -- chords and such, but I suspect anyone could learn given the time. Mother Maybelle Carter is the best known player, I think, but there are many more.

So, I'm playing the thing fairly regularly. I copied some pages from one of Lindsay's bluegrass books and can play all of them. I've got some Hank Williams, Sr. books that are lots of fun.

My reviews, however, are mixed. Justin says I'm doing great (and that makes me feel good). The few times I've played for my parents, they just want me to sing along -- I don't think they know the songs. Lindsay just laughs (which hurts a bit, I think, but maybe she's laughing for joy at my talent -- yeah, that's it).

Here's a rough sample... What do you think? (Just hit the play button.)

Justin and I have played in church once and just messed around with the AutoHarp and Piano a few times. I'd like to get a string band of some sort together. I need a guitar player and a banjo picker. I think the undertaker from Rutherford would probably play upright bass, if I asked him. Lindsay doesn't seem very receptive to fiddle playing, but perhaps someone (other than me) could work on her.

I'd never heard of an Autoharp (or at least thought of one more than a second) before seeing the movie Walk The Line. What are/were your impressions? Lots of people seem to think it's an instrument for grade-school teachers (and I know several that do play), but isn't really a serious instrument.

Technorati Tags:autoharp, bluegrass, music, recordings, Angel Band

She doesn't deserve you

2007-05-28T00:16:00.000-05:00

I was in the midst of a conversation tonight where one friend said to another, among other things, "She doesn't deserve you." It was a funny conversation, filled with expletives not appropriate for this venue, but it got me to thinking about that statement.

"She doesn't deserve you"

So, is that a good things -- as in, "You're too good for her, she doesn't deserve you"? That's a positive and uplifting statement meant to make the man or woman feel good himself or herself.

Or, is it a bad thing, as in, "You're crazy nuts, she doesn't deserve [someone like] you"? That's funny -- honesty from one friend to another.

That makes me think of the quote form Oliver Wendell Holmes from his work The Autocrat of the Breakfast Table:

Don't flatter yourself that friendship authorizes you to say disagreeable things to your intimates. The nearer you come into relation with a person, the more necessary do tact and courtesy become. Except in cases of necessity, which are rare, leave your friend to learn unpleasant things from his enemies; they are ready enough to tell them.

Of course, later in the conversation, I heard, "You deserve better." Which clarified the conversation a bit. I laughed inside; I thought it best to keep my thoughts to myself.

Technorati Tags:relationships, romance, Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., truth

More on "Wagon Wheel"

2007-05-24T15:36:00.000-05:00

I know I've already blogged today, but I was reading a bit about Old Crow and found this link to a recent blog about the song "Wagon Wheel" released by Old Crow.

Talking with Tim and Chad (who I mentioned in my previous entry today) about the song last night, none of us could remember the story behind the song. We knew that Old Crow had most recently made the song famous, but we also knew that in fact, it was a cover of someone else's song. Chad was convinced that it was Alison Kraus and Tim agreed with him -- probably to get him to shut up. I knew that wasn't right, but I couldn't remember the story. Now, thanks to the miracle of the interweb, we find the true story on the Nine Bullets blog. Yeah. It's a Bob Dylan song which he never completed for a move I've never seen. Oh well....

The neatest thing about that link, though, is that they're offering several different versions of the song for download. If you'd like a copy of these different versions and can't download for some reason, let me know. I'll divshare them to you... Cool beans!

Technorati Tags:Old Crow Medicine Show, Music, Bob Dylan

"Wagon Wheel" and Destin Nights

2007-05-24T11:29:00.000-05:00

My day has become pretty standard: I sleep until around 11, hit the beach at about noon, return to the condo at about 3, eat supper around 5:30 and I'm at the Village (clubs) by 9:15 or so.

My favorite hangout has been Mango's Paradise Grille, a neat little outdoor cantina at "the Village". They've got live music each night and the brew selection is outstanding. I've managed to make it through all the drafts and I'm working my way through the bottles now. I'm hoping to have sampled their entire menu by the time I leave. The wait staff their is friendly, the owner is great, and the crowd is as diverse as I could imagine.

My bartenders since Sunday have either been Haley or Charles (click the pic to the left for a larger one). Haley is from Auburn, Alabama, Charles is from everywhere, apparently. They're engaged to be married, have a neat little condo not far from here, and work two or three jobs each. Haley and Charles love the Destin life. I dunno if I could put up with a bunch of tourist drunks 7 days a week, but they seem to be just fine. It's probably a personality thing that I just don't have; after about 7 hours, I had little patience for drunk buttholes when I was on Beale Street.

The owner of the place is a guy named Keith and his wife, Shelly. I met them last year when the place first opened. Keith owns some sort of steel fabricating place in Atlanta, but he and Shelly's dream was to open a restaurant and bar on the beach -- last year they made it a reality. I think Keith's main motivation, in addition to making his wife happy, was to find a place they'd let him sing anytime he wanted. I found out this week that the guy is an amazing vocalist.

Along the way I've met some other interesting folks. You're not surprised, if you know me, I'm sure:

Dwayne: The 29 year old Australian Spa Consultant. Dwayne travels the world consulting at 5 star spas and resorts. He and I got into some pretty great trouble the other night after we left Mango's. Remind me to tell you about it. Not quite the highlight of my trip, but it was certainly a great boost for the evening.

Justin: 30 something Navy guy -- he's taking a bomb disposal class at Pensacola Naval Air Station. He's been all over the middle east and has got some serious stories to tell. He was most interested in talking to me, however, about the "Purple Church" in Memphis. He was really bummed out to hear that it had closed. We swapped some stories.

Tina and Shelia: Mother and daughter. As Shelia said, "Mom bought a pair and so did I!" Tina likes to dance. Shelia likes to dance. We got along well. Shelia's tube-top made things interesting -- and she had one of those pony-tails that sticks out the back of her cap which I think are so cute. I wish I had a picture (oh how I wish I had a picture!). Tina kept grabbing my butt. That was strange and slightly unnerving.

Jerry: 70 something year old real-estate investment guy -- he was with Tina, but seemed more interested in Shelia. Me too. He's got property all up and down the gulf-coast. I bet I know what Tina sees in him.

Paula: The 25 year old "Turtle Girl" from FSU. She was coming up the beach on Tuesday with probes and shovels and all sort of stuff. I didn't know if she was trying to set up a beach volley-ball course or set up a landing field for aliens. I discovered, on asking, that she was doing sea-turtle research for the Master's Degree. Fascinating, really. We spent several minutes talking about sea-turtles... Amazingly, she showed up again yesterday, but now she was taking in the beach as a tourist. I didn't know it was her until she came over to talk again. We met up at Mango's and then went dancing like rhythm-less white people. She had too much "mango tea". 'Nuff said.

This list doesn't include Chad B, "the executive" from Anniston, AL, who's here apparently to debauch under-age women. He works at GameStop as a manager of some sort He says he's NOT a redneck, but I find that hard to believe. Nor does the above list include Tamara, who is here a few days early for a Porn Star Convention. She doesn't look like an actress, but some of her friends do. Maybe she's the producer or something.

Tim, the guitar player, and his wife have performed at two of the places I've been hanging out (Mango's and Fat Tuesday). They played "Wagon Wheel" by Old Crow last night. I thought I was gonna die -- I danced with a lovely young lady from NC 'cause I noticed she was singing too.. :) Both the girl from NC and Tim the musician were incredibly jealous that I saw Old Crow a few weeks back.

There are more strange folks to document.. perhaps I'll get around to it.

I'm headed back to the beach in a few -- gonna try to even out my burn/tan. Call me! I'd love to hear from you, I'm sure!

Update: I've written More on Wagon Wheel

Technorati Tags:Destin, FL, Florida, Destin, Mango's Paradise Grille, Women, Relationships, Vacation, Bars, Sandestin, Old Crow Medicine Show

I'm an Australian!

2007-05-22T00:54:00.001-05:00

Sandestin's Village at Baytowne Wharf
Originally uploaded by chiacomo.

I'm not a beach fan, really. The sun is fine, but I'm fair skinned. The sand is fine, but it gets in all my shoes. I like the night life; I like to boogie.

For years, there's been little to do after dark except to wander the beach looking for "friends". Now, thanks to the miracle of modern development, one can party and "club" into the wee hours of the morning at Sandestin's "Village at Baytowne Wharf". There are 4 GREAT nightclubs and at least one good neighborhood bar (where folks remember your name). All this little country boy has to do is board the free tram and cross the highway and I'm set to go.

Tonight I met the nicest guy from Australia named Dwayne. He was friendly enough, has a neat job and stuff. The BEST thing about Dwayne, though, is that he's from Australia. WOMEN LOVE GUYS WITH FUNNY ACCENTS. I won't go into details, but I'll say that I don't mind being lumped into the Australian crowd at the clubs at Baytowne Wharf. It was the funniest thing; 19 and 21 year old coeds kept screaming, "They're from Australia!!!!" Of course, being the gentleman that I am, I kept stressing that HE was an Aussie, but I was from Tennessee. Even with my carefully cultivated Tennessee drawl, they didn't seem to notice. Apparently, for tonight, I TOO was from Australia. My new nationality served me well. She was 21, I swear.

Technorati Tags:Destin, FL, Women, bars, Sandestin

Love in the 21st century

2007-05-19T23:56:00.001-05:00

Love spelt on keyboard
Originally uploaded by Kevin White Images.

The other day a friend was telling me that her boyfriend was on a mission trip abroad. She asked me, "Do you think he'll be able to text me from there?" She asked me this over an instant messenger (Yahoo, I think, but I use Pidgin/GaIM to aggregate all my IM services) -- I almost always communicate with this friend via email or instant message.

I told her I was unsure -- she'd just have to wait and see. This got me to thinking about my relationships over the last five years and how much of those relationships was conducted "online" or via text message or even telephone, and not in person or through regular mail. I realized that LOTS of my "romantic communication" was conducted via new-fangled technological means. I've flirted on MySpace, wooed over instant messenger, and teased via text message. I've sent online greeting cards and written poetry on web-pages.

In the old days people courted in person. Your beau might show up at the house on a Sunday afternoon (because he worked the rest of the week) and sit with you and your family in your parlor or kitchen. If you were lucky, Ma and Pa might allow you some time alone with him. As the years moved on, young people went to movies and dances. I'm sure the telephone was a boon to lovestruck boys as they whispered fervently across the line to a swooning sweetie. I know I've spent hours on the phone with women and realized that we talked about absolutely nothing -- and I can still smile about it.

There was a time, before instant messages and cell-phone texts, when people sent love letters and notes. Sometimes it took days or even weeks to receive a perfumed letter, all the while the sender wondering how it might be received. Now, we can know within minutes or even seconds how our flirtings or expressions of affection are received; we can adapt and respond just as quickly.

We're probably much more cautious, in a way, these days. As a male, I know I constantly try to adapt to the mood of a woman, whether in person or online. Women are cagey creatures whose thoughts are veiled to men. Where once I might write a flowing missive pouring out adoration, I now write short quips, trying to gauge if she's receptive to my advances. Were you to write me a passionate message, pouring your soul into an emotional email, who knows how long it would take me to click "Forward" and send it on to my buddies -- especially if I weren't receptive to your advances. (Know, ladies, that I would never do that, of course, but some would and have -- I've gotten such forwards and so have you.)

I read a blog the other day of a guy living in Memphis who met a girl in January and was engaged at the end of April. That's FAST to me. I know social mores and expectations have changed and there's nothing wrong with that, but, reading in his blog how he texted and emailed and waited on the "beep-beep-beep" indicating a new message, I wonder how fast his courtship was accelerated due to technology. Would she be wearing a diamond engagement ring if he had plied his troth so quickly sixty years ago?

Have we lost something due to the immediacy of communication? I don't know. I know that I have written long and passionate letters and actually mailed them and they're almost always well-received. Has "courtship" been hastened through the use of instant messages and email? I don't know, but I've certainly been turned down before I ever had the chance to open my mouth in person.

Technorati Tags:love, relationships, new technology, email

Fashion for geeks, thanks women-folk!

2007-05-18T23:04:00.001-05:00

I've got lots of women in my life -- I get lots of fashion advice, advice about how to act, what to wear. I'm pretty luck. The other morning, I had a long conversation with Marilyn and Judy in our office. I had lost some weight and Judy knew that. I asked about pants and how I generally didn't like the pants I was wearing because they weren't cuffed.

I always wear cuffed pants, but Judy said, "You shouldn't wear cuffed pants." Cuffs are out and pleats are out, apparently. You know, all of my pants are pleated, except for maybe two pair. I guess I like pleats 'cause my dad has always worn pleats. That's what they bought me when I was young. Old habits are hard to break.

Flat fronted pants -- they're a new thing for me. I need to check that out.

I've got women in my life that help me with my "fashion". Some of them are older women, like Judy and Marilyn and my mother. Some of them are younger women, like Liz, who told me last year to "loosen up". I started with untucking my shirt and wearing tennis shoes. Now I've even got a woven belt with no loops -- it's like a strap around my waist. It's not leather, it's simpe cloth.I like it. I've also got some flip-flops (or "thongs" as the Europeans" call them). Flip flops are a big step for me, you know.

Some of these women are older, huggable women. Some of these women are foks I cuddle with; some are folks I'd like to cuddle with. I have an interesting life with so many women trying to help me.

I found a website the other day, which I've shared with some of you, called "Fashion for Nerds". My women-folk aren't wrong, according to this website.

What other advice can you give me?

Technorati Tags: fashion, geeks, personal

New office manager - with dragonfly

2007-05-17T23:19:00.001-05:00

We have a new office manager. I've known her for several years; she used to work for one of our customers. She's been of about a year and a half. They expect her to be "tough" on us, but we'll see. She's very sweet, very competent, etc etc... Our customers appear to like her so far.

She also makes me "as nervous as a cat". She's trying to catch on so very quickly. Trying to corral me -- which is part of her job, I'm told. Trying to understand how I work and how to interpret what I say. She's been asking for explanations of the processes which are my job; the paperwork, the way to handle my callers and certain customers. I'm glad to share all that, of course, but I'm also trying to wrap up like a THOUSAND loose ends before I leave for Destin on Sunday. So, I'm fidgety and trying to get lots done and she's trying to work. It'll work out and I'm not unhappy.

Judy wore the neatest blouse (or shirt, according to Adrienne) today. It had an embroidered dragonfly on the upper left quadrant. I thought at first that it was a brooch, but it's actually part of the shirt. She bought it at the Kellwood outlet, she said.

Dragonflies are said to represent new light and joy. Some cultures, however, view them as evil or sinister things -- the "devil's needle" or "ear cutter" -- and are linked to injury. I prefer to focus on the positive symbolism -- some Native American tribes say they represent swiftness and activity. Some tribes see them as a symbol of renewal after a time of hardship. The Japanese see courage, happiness and strength.

I just thought it was a neat shirt (or blouse) or whatever.

Technorati Tags: office, work, dragonfly, change

"Scary Jesus" is gone!

2007-05-16T22:24:00.001-05:00

Those of you who have traveled with me, or by yourself, between Humboldt and Bells (perhaps on your way to Memphis) may remember passing this lovely yard ornament affectionately known among my circle of friends and acquaintances as "Scary Jesus". A local landowner, presumably in the spirit of roadside evangelism, created a welded-metal depiction of a crucified Jesus. With its exposed metal ribs and rust arms hanging from the cross, it was truly disturbing (especially on seeing it the first time). Some comic relief was provided by the kneeling cowboy and horse silhouette beneath the cross.

I remember the first time Lindsay saw it while we were traveling to Memphis in November 2006. She said, "What the hell is that?" Of course, I immediately stopped and turned around so she could get a better look. Since then she's warned me sternly not to slow down.

In the past few months it appears that someone has begun construction on what seems to be a church on the site. A new building was erected behind and to the right of Scary Jesus. It seems to be a metal frame building. Lots of earth work has been done (perhaps to prepare a parking lot).

I passed by the lot Friday last week and notice that SCARY JESUS IS GONE. No, Scary Jesus didn't climb down from the cross. The whole tableau is missing: no cross, no Jesus, no kneeling cowboy and horse. I'm hoping Scary Jesus will be back; it's certainly a conversation starter (and sometimes stopper).

The small pictures here don't really do it justice. Click the pic for a larger version.

Technorati Tags: scary jesus, jesus, evangelism, yard ornament

Feeling blue

2007-05-14T23:51:00.001-05:00

I'm feeling a bit blue. I want nothing more than to do a certain thing, but I know I musn't. It wouldn't matter anyway. What I imagine the truth to be and the real, honest truth are two different things. I am weak. I am weak even to be writing this, but I feel like writing, so I am.

In my head I am making plans; plans that won't work out the way I imagine. I know, even thinking about them, that they'll never happen as I imagine. Imagination is an amazing thing. Fantasy is a release, but the reality following fantasy is a drag.

Why should I waste my emotional energy? I don't know. I know only that I am. I wish I could snap my fingers and make it go away. Time. Time. Time. That's what it'll take. I don't know if I'm strong enough to wait.

Technorati Tags: relationships, fantasy, blue, dumb

New flops

2007-05-13T21:14:00.001-05:00

New flops

Originally uploaded by chiacomo.

On Lindsay's recommendation, with advice from Adrienne (she said I needed "substantial man flops"), and some in-store guidance from Sara,

I purchased my first pair of flip-flops, ever. I remember wearing a pair of flip-flops when I was very young, I think they had a picture of Snoopy the Dog on them, but I have no idea where they are and I know they wouldn't fit.

Those of you who know me well will remember that I have a thing about my feet. The standard story is that when I was very young my father used to sit me on the side of the road and that people would stop as they passed saying, "Oh my! Look at that little boy with the ugly feet."

I wouldn't say that I have a complex, exactly, but I've always been self-conscious about my feet. Only my closest friends have previously seen my feet. Thanks to the influence of a certain person, however, I'm changing slowly. I'm becoming less conservative in my dress (see also the GREAT plaid shorts in this picture). I'm not tucking my shirt in when I'm not working... I dunno. Liz said last year that I needed to "loosen up". I'm trying Liz, I am, and I think I'm enjoying it.

I don't like feet in general. I like Adrienne's feet and Lindsay's, but I'm not too fond of most people's feet. I don't think I'm gonna get over my "foot thing" any time soon.

So, should I buy some more flops or should I ditch these suckers and hide them?

Technorati Tags: flip-flops, fashion, shoes, change

That damned liberal girlfriend

2007-05-12T17:37:00.001-05:00

I had an opportunity to speak with state Representative Chris Crider (Republican) at the Governor's Luncheon in Humboldt on Friday. I know Chris pretty well, we talk from time to time about local politics, projects on which the city is working, and just gossip. We're not personally close, but we're friendly. It's always fun to talk to him.

I'd been "working the room" as my aunt says and I found Chris at the head table. I wanted to say hello, but I also had a serious question or two to ask, so I made sure to seek him out. He saw me and smiled as I walked onto the dais. He stuck out his hand, gave me a firm handshake, and grabbed my shoulder. Suddenly he looked sort of frightened -- almost hiding behind me as he glanced around.

I thought perhaps something was happening behind me -- something I might need to worry about or someone I needed to avoid. I looked at Chris, concern in my eyes, and said, "What's wrong? Who are you looking for?"

"That damned liberal girlfriend of yours! Where is she?" he asked.

"She's not here and she's not my girlfriend... besides, she thinks you don't like her, especially after you dodged the two of us at the Chamber of Commerce Banquet," I replied and laughed as I said it.

Chris, looking relieved, laughed, "Yeah, I like her just fine -- I just don't know what to say to her. I can't talk to her."

Imagine! A politician, a friendly kind of guy who always has something to say to everyone rendered speechless by a twenty-three year old math teacher!

Technorati Tags: politics, chris crider, tennessee, relationships

A. Schwab's

2007-05-10T23:46:00.000-05:00

A. Schwab's - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:

A. Schwab's is the only remaining original business on Beale Street. Their motto is "If you can't find it at A. Schwab's, you don't need it!"

I visited "A. Scwab's" during the Beale Street Music Festival on Saturday. I've been going into Schwab's for a bout a decade now and the store hasn't changed much. The layout is still a shambles, the staff is still surly, and the merchandise is still a hodge-podge of touristy kitche and stuff that might belong in a 1920s dry goods store.

They claim to be a dry goods store but the only non-tourist stuff I picked up on right away was a set of ancient looking water pumps (you know the kind with the handle).

We did notice a huge collection of dried voodoo ingredients in the back of the store; I suppose those might qualify as "dry goods".

Schwab's truly is a landmark. It's unusual to find any business owned by the same person or family on Beale Street for more than a decade. If you have the chance, I recommend dropping by. They're open only during the day, though, so night-owls are left out.

Technorati tags: memphis travel a+schwab's dry+goods store tourist Beale+Street

Business cards -- wow!

2007-05-08T15:54:00.001-05:00

P1010275

Originally uploaded by dailypoetics.

I've really enjoyed looking through these different business cards. It's amazing how creative people are with disposable bits of paper.

I like this one, especially, 'cause it has Matt's name on it.

My own business cards are pretty austere by these standards. They simply have my name, our company logo, and the logo of one of our major product lines. The cards is well made, though. High quality paper, raised lettering, vivid colors. I was tickled to pink when I realized I could put anything I wanted on it. I finally chose to put NO title. Just let folks figure out what I am and what I am not.

Over the years, I've had calling cards printed up. These are basically cards with my name, address, sometimes telephone number, and in the last decade or so, my email address and website. They're super handy at parties and many people are absolutely charmed by them.

Here in the south, calling cards can be handy when you drop by someone's house unannounced and find them not home. Wedge a calling card in the door and they'll know you dropped by.

Technorati Tags: business cards, relationships, business, photography, flickr

Stop Sending Those “Don’t Buy Gas” Emails

2007-05-08T15:07:00.001-05:00

Stop Sending Those “Don’t Buy Gas” Emails

The first (and most obvious) reason is you are simply delaying the purchase of the gasoline you need; we’re not actually decreasing the demand for gas (which might bring the prices down), we’re just shifting the demand to another day in the very near future.

I have forwarded similar emails in the past; it just makes sense that the big fuel companies would notice if everyone stopped buying gas on one day. In fact, they probably won't. They KNOW we're gonna need their product again very soon. Until America decreases its reliance on foreign fossil fuels we'll always be essentially at the mercy of big oil. I don't see myself changing my driving habits any time soon, do you?

Technorati Tags: fuel prices, gas, email, forwards, glurge

My ego?

2007-05-08T00:09:00.001-05:00

I am a persuasive person. I have always managed to sell stuff -- merchandise, ideas, myself, whatever. I have a large and powerful ego to which people seem to respond. I have convinced myself that I am better than average, that I am a likable and reasonably good looking guy -- and that since I believe these things, others do too. I think I can do something, therefore I can. I am convinced that I can talk a person into anything, make a person believe anything (especially when it's the truth and I believe it), that given enough time and the right words (which have always seemed to be present in my mouth at the right time) I can do anything or have anything I want.

The whole paragraph above sounds terribly conceited -- and I'm not. I promise. I am fortunate (lucky?) and good with words and good with people generally. I am honest and straightforward and hide very little emotionally and people respond to that on a basic, primal level, usually.

I guess it's a function of my ego, or perhaps a breakdown somewhere along the way, that's been frustrating me so much lately. I've said the right words, behaved in the right way and I can't get what I want. My ego is wounded and I am hurt, I guess. It's a deep down kind of hurt that I can't shake -- like a broken leg or something. It will take some time to heal; I'll be bruised for a bit.

It's not that I always get what I want. On the contrary, I'm regularly disappointed. Sometimes people don't respond rationally, sometimes I fail to reach the mark. Often I simply quit trying. If the effort is turning out to be greater than the reward, I'll often quit midstream. Sometimes I wait a while and still get what I want. Sometimes I never do.

I can almost always rationalize my failures by, as I say, attributing them to other people's irrationality or my own laziness (but not to a lack of quality or skill on my part). Sometimes I realize I didn't want it as badly as I thought. Often my desire for something, an object or a goal, simply fades away.

So friends, forgive me if I'm being royal king-sh*t asshole. I'm not getting what I want and don't like it. You might try stroking my ego a bit; that never hurts.

Technorati Tags: ego, relationships, personality, desire, wants, success, failure

Why use "CC"?

2007-05-04T12:11:00.001-05:00

Carbon copy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The CC recipients are revealed to all recipients, and this may not be desirable, depending on the situation. An alternative field, BCC, or Blind Carbon Copy, is available for hidden notification. In common usage, To field recipients are the primary audience of the message, CC field recipients are others whom the author wishes to publicly inform of the message, and BCC field recipients are those surreptitiously being informed of the communication.

Obviously this is one of those topics that just popped into my head about 20 minutes ago. I got to wondering, in this day and age, why anyone would use a "CC:" field in an email. All popular mail clients and web-based email sites allow you to put scads of email addresses in the "To" field -- so, why would I every use a "CC"? A passable answer is found in the Wikipedia (the sum of all useful human knowledge). Apparently, recipients of CC'd messages aren't necessarily expected to reply; they're simply being notified. One might CC one's supervisor to make him aware of the message, but he's not expected to take action.

Interesting, huh?

I use BCC when sending forwards, of course. Lately, I've been BCC'ing people on messages that I didn't want the primary recipients (those in the "To:" box) to know I was communicating with. Apparently, I shouldn't be talking to certain people right now. Long story. I'm rambling. :)

Technorati Tags: email, BCC, CC, messaging, privacy

On this cool clear night

2007-05-02T00:33:00.000-05:00

On this cool clear night
The moon is bright and I
Stand beneath the stars
Wondering if somewhere
You and your golden hair
Lay thinking or pondering o'er
Past or future, do you
Think of what might have been or be?
Do you remember or dream or
Do you perhaps even long just a little
For me?

- April, 2007

Jesus is my DEALER

2007-04-13T10:01:00.001-05:00

The Herald Democrat

When he asked her if she knew why McDaniel stopped her, she stated “because I was walking in traffic.” Yes, that was correct, and he explained she couldn’t walk in the roadway. Then, he asked her if she was high on some kind of drug. Her answer, the report said, was “I am. It’s the Holy Spirit and little bit of marijuana.” He asked if she had any left and she said, “Not enough to get you high, but I know who to go to for more.” McDaniel asked who and she answered, “Jesus.”

Hrm. I wonder what church she's going to? I've heard of Jesus as God incarnate, the head of the church, brother, friend, Superstar, lamb, and on and on; he's got dozens or hundreds of "roles" in our society, but I've never thought of Jesus as my DEALER.

Technorati Tags: Jesus, drugs, news, funny, marijuana

May the Eye of Horus shine upon you all

2007-04-10T13:55:00.001-05:00

The UT Martin Pacer - Letters to the Editor - Viewpoints

We do not try to convince others of the greatness of the Boy King: His powerful image speaks for itself. We do not spend any money on advertising as all the donations we receive go to "the obelisk fund" as we like to call it. We hope to build an obelisk in Northwest Tennessee, at an undisclosed location, around which we can gather and pray to the Boy King that he may spread His wings over us. His supremacy over all other deities is unquestionable and we believe that, like Him, we will conquer Death.

I read The Pacer on occasion -- the letters to the editor can sometimes be very enlightening (or funny). THIS letter is just downright hilarious! Makes me think the movie Young Sherlock Holmes. Just think! Somewhere in the boonies of Northwest Tennessee someone is scouting land to build an obelisk to honor and worship the Sun God, Amun-Ra!

Surely this is parody. Surely.

Technorati Tags: UT Martin, Tennessee, College, News, Opinion, Egypt, Amun-Ra, strange

Let the lower lights be burning

2007-04-01T23:11:00.001-05:00

We were on our way to Taco Bell for supper tonight and saw this interesting menorah gleaming from a cross street in Milan. It caught my eye -- strange to see something like this on the side of the road.

There was no one visible inside the church or outside on the street. It was still burning an hour later on our way back.

Technorati Tags: Milan, church, strange, picture

True grit -- Another first for Eric

2007-03-29T19:06:00.001-05:00

Eric tried grits for the first time (ever) today. I don't think he likes them. He mixed them with butter and salt. My mother indicated that he might try them with cheese next time.

A $1 parking ticket? How cheap!

2007-03-28T16:34:00.001-05:00

ABC News: $1 Parking Ticket From 1980 Paid Off

A $1 parking ticket from 1980 has been paid off, after the offender sent the payment along with a $3 late fee to police without giving a name.

When I left Memphis, I folded up a hundred dollar bill, stuck it in a library book, and dropped it into the night depository at the main branch of the library. I hope they're not still looking for me. A friend who worked there told me that at one time, my picture was taped to the circulation desk with "DO NOT LEND" stenciled across the top.

This story reminds me that my Dad got a parking ticket when he was in Memphis one time. I had intended to "get it fixed" but I never did. I wonder if the MPD is on the lookout for him? I can imagine that conversation now.

Technorati Tags: cities, stories, fines, parking tickets

Rats from a sinking ship -- but why did they get on?

2007-03-28T09:23:00.001-05:00

Delta Air plans for stock to trade on NYSE in May | Transportation | Reuters

Existing shares of Delta will be wiped out when the company emerges from Chapter 11. Delta has said it expects to have a market value of $10 billion.

I've done some profoundly stupid things in my life... The most recent didn't involve a woman.

My father was sitting in my office the other day using a spare computer to check his email (he's not yet a gmail devotee' -- he's still on Yahoo, blech) and watching the market. Dad commented that Delta's stock was doing pretty well and was cheap that day... Yeah, it's DALRQ; the "Q" stands for Bankruptcy.

So, after watching the thing trade for a few minutes I absently hit the "buy" button and became the proud owner of 500 shares of this venerable air carrier. I bought at, I think, $.81... I got out at $.71, yesterday, and it's trading right now at $.52 with the bottom continuing to fall out

Now, my question is why in the world is anyone even still trading this thing? I know that there are a few idiots like me who didn't fully research the thing before doing a "Quick Buy", but that can't be all of it. It's destined to crash and burn, horribly, before May 1. At this late date, with its funeral already planned and the mourners having their suits pressed, why is anyone BUYING this thing?

Technorati Tags: delta airlines, stupid, stocks, finance, pink sheets

Gmail down -- someone send up a flare!

2007-03-27T14:39:00.001-05:00

Dammit. I need my Gmail.

I like the idea of moving as much of my life as possible to web-based apps -- mainly 'cause I have access to them everywhere -- but when one of them breaks, it's a pain. I continue to applaud Google and gmail, though. I understand brief outages.

Technorati Tags: Gmail, google, outage,

Secular legislators?

2007-03-27T00:52:00.001-05:00

God's dupes - Los Angeles Times

PETE STARK, a California Democrat, appears to be the first congressman in U.S. history to acknowledge that he doesn't believe in God. In a country in which 83% of the population thinks that the Bible is the literal or "inspired" word of the creator of the universe, this took political courage.

This is interesting. I wonder how it will impact his bid for re-election. We shouldn't be concerned about legislators who don't believe in God (or any god for that matter) -- one's belief in a higher power doesn't necessarily affect one's judgment or even one's morality. I suspect, however, that Representative Stark will face wide criticism for his admission.

Technorati Tags: politics, religion, congress, pete stark

You're every other beat of my heart

2007-03-07T23:24:00.000-06:00

You're every other beat of my heart
An integral part of my pulse,
Regular and reliable
Pumping life and love and peace through each day
Even far, distant, this cadence brings you into my mind.

When I breath, I inhale and know
That somewhere, you breath also
As I exhale your name flutters, a whisper,
Across my lips.

I do not long for you as lover longs for lover
I long for you as the river longs for the sea
A tree, in full bloom, longing for the gentle breeze of spring
Your words, soft touch, warmth
Resonate, vibrate, reassure, sustain me
As you are every other beat of my heart.

-February 2007

In her eyes I find her beauty

2007-01-29T00:31:00.001-06:00

In her eyes I find her beauty
So much surrounded by loveliness, but
Outdone by the depths of emotion
In those gateways to her soul.

Transfixed, I stare
As the quietness in that busy world
Overwhelms me, drowning out
My cares, my thoughts,
I am drawn instead into dreams.

For a moment, no surely an hour
I am in another place
Not with her, but not apart
The longing may come in waves, as
In her eyes I find her beauty.

2006 - for Adrienne

I stood behind you on the street

2007-01-29T00:29:00.002-06:00

I stood behind you on the street
And I knew you and you knew I was behind
You didn't turn around, but you knew I put
My hand on your shoulder to wrap you
In my arms you didn't want to be
You said as you turned as if you
Meant to turn all along,
"Watch how they tap their feet," and led
Me away losing my words and my dreams as they
Walked down the street.

1998 - for Jessica

Just hold my hand

2007-01-29T00:26:00.000-06:00

Just hold my hand and
I will dream
Of tender moments that might be.
Perhaps a dream of your laugh,
Of a whispered word, you so close
I feel your soft breath on my neck.

Just hold my hand
For only a moment
I might imagine breathing so
Lightly as our lips touch,
My eyes closed but my vision filled with
So many shooting stars.

Just hold my hand
A light touch and
I can feel your warmth,
The same warmth I long to
Feel as I hold you, still and quiet.
Just hold my hand.

2007 - following New Year

And so I placed you on a pedestal

2007-01-19T23:34:00.000-06:00

And so I placed you on a pedestal
High above me because in my mind
I was less than worthy
Beneath you standing I smiled and found myself
Proud to recognize such beauty and grace
Pleased to elevate it and revere it.

And so like all things earthly
You became something else when
Separate from the earth and me
You changed, at least in my perception.
Perhaps it was the lack of oxygen, so high had I placed you, or
Perhaps you were never what I thought you to be
Before I placed you on a pedestal.

God and Math: What if the big guy says 2 + 2 doesn't equal 4?

2006-08-09T22:38:00.000-05:00

I was looking at my college webpage on the Internet Wayback Machine last night (the server has been off-line for some years now). Some of you may remember that I rambled quite a bit back then. I read some of my old "blog" entries -- my posts were called "Thoughts of the Day" and resembled a blog, though no one had ever heard the term at the time.

Some of my posts were quite funny (and I may share them with you), others were pretty depressing, especially when I remember what motivated them. Anyway... reading these old musings prompted me to ramble a bit in my own mind last night:

What if all evidence contradicts God?
So, I'm facing a situation where, in my mind, all things point to one answer and in my heart, God is telling me something entirely different. It isn't quite so cut and dried as God saying 2 + 2 equals 5, but I am quite confused. I'm questioning God, questioning my interpretation of his purpose, and just generally confused.

Every fiber of my being screams that X is true, all evidence indicates that X is true, independent observers have confirmed that X appears to be true... When I ask God if X is true, I get an ambiguous answer that seems to indicate that it is in fact NOT true (I really don't get an answer at all). I suppose it could be that one part of my brain refuses to accept his answer and is therefore looking past it. It could be that I'm simply to dense to see that God is CONFIRMING my suspicion that X is true. I dunno.

I really wish he'd go ahead and tell me one way or another.

Lord, help me understand your purpose and intentions. I'm blunt -- send me a lightning bolt (figuratively) or something, please....

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The importance of a comma -- "a basic rule of punctuation"

2006-08-07T23:10:00.000-05:00

globeandmail.com : 'A basic rule of punctuation':

A grammatical blunder may force Rogers Communications Inc. to pay an extra $2.13-million to use utility poles in the Maritimes after the placement of a comma in a contract permitted the deal's cancellation.

I'm a big fan of commas, as you may know. I'm also facinated by the law (though contract law can be boring as all get-out). The situation above illustrates perfectly why we hire lawyers to create and review legal documents -- and, also as illustrated above, sometimes they can screw up!

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Thoughts on friendship: "Keeping score..."

2006-08-06T17:30:00.000-05:00

The Bible says that "the love of money is the root of evil" -- or something similar. We hear that passage misquoted often as "money is the root of evil". Do you ruminate on what your friends owe you? Is it your turn to pay the bar bill or someone else's? Did you loan your buddy $10 and do you expect it back? So many friendships are allowed to sour because we're keeping score.

I moved back to my small hometown several years ago (6 or 7, I can't remember). I do remember that I hadn't been home long when, as I had no plans for the evening, my dad asked me to watch my brother while my dad and mom went out for supper. As he was gathering up his wallet, keys, etc before he walked out the door, my Dad discovered he had no cash. He asked, "Nathan, do you have any cash?" As it was Friday and I had gotten paid that day and had taken some cash when I deposited my check, I had about $150. I told him so and he said, "Let me borrow about $100." Of course I loaned it to him --I thought nothing of it...

Several weeks later I remembered this "loan" and quizzed pop about it... He said to me with a smile on his face, "If you wanna keep score, I can start dragging out American Express bills for the last several years." I was a bit shocked -- and humbled. Who knows how much of my father's money I'd spent using that gold-plated credit-card -- I don't know and Dad certainly doesn't know. I learned a valuable lesson from my father over the years and this was the moment when the lesson became real.

Don't keep score...
If you love your friends and your friends love you -- if they are true friends, you needn't keep up with who owes who what. You spend on them, they spend on you. You do them favors, they do favors for you. Friendship should be an equitable relationship, yes, but you shouldn't carry a ledger book around in your back pocket.

When I can and when the fancy strikes me, I commonly pick up the check for dinner or other fun and exciting activities when I'm hanging out with my friends. Sometimes the tab is small and sometimes it's not so small. Often, if we're with people who don't know me terribly well, folks begin to reach for the pocketbooks or bill-folds to "pay me back". I can see the calculations rolling through their heads as they add up what their portion of the bill should be -- I generally hide the ticket away as quickly as possible to make this process more difficult. My general response to requests for a sub-total is to say, "We'll settle up later." In my mind, we've already settled up! I've had the pleasure of their company and they've had to put up with me -- a fair bargain for the cost of the meal or a few rounds of drinks, in my mind at least.

To not keep score can be a difficult habit to adopt. We tend to immediately think of what people owe us... But, if you're with true friends, you should know that it'll all come out even in the end.

It's important, if you're not keeping score, to remember to always give at every opportunity. Always offer to help. Always offer to pay (and sometimes force the issue). Always wash the dishes. Never remind someone that you paid last time. It's always your turn.

Don't loan money; give it away...
I don't loan my friends money. I don't do it. It's a bad practice and it almost always leads to conflict. If you're loaning friends money, you're setting up a business relationship and business relationships and friendship often clash. I give folks money, if I can afford it, and am pleased when they pay me back. I'm not disappointed if they don't -- 'cause I didn't expect it.

The important rule to remember is never to give a friend more money than you can afford to lose. If it hurts you to give it and you have to have it back at some point, don't loan it. Simple, huh? You'll save yourself lots of grief and strained conversations.

This was tough for me...
Several years ago a friend of mine -- a very good friend -- backed over my parked car. We laughed about it at the time. The damage was entirely superficial; a dented door and some scrapes were the only indication that something had happened. My friend offered to pay for the repairs and I said "sure"... The mistake on my part was preparing myself to actually be recompensed for the damage.

I had the car repaired -- I think the bill was about $400, but it may have been closer to $600. I kept the bill and called my friend, saying that the repairs were complete and I offered to supply a copy of the bill. That's okay, the friend said, no bother, I'll send you a check. I've never seen a penny.

Now, I know that my friend simply forgot. My friend wouldn't stiff me on purpose. I never mentioned it again, however. "WHAT???" you say? Nope, I never mentioned it. This would create a situation where money was, for only a second, at the center of our friendship. A debt would be the topic of conversation. As time passed I lay awake at night thinking about that money -- there were times when I could really have used it, times when my own wallet was a bit thin. This is when not keeping score became hard. I had made a mistake, as I mentioned above, in preparing myself for the money.

I am simply not going to permit money come between me and those I love. It's a cursed mistake and I'm not going to do it -- I recommend that you avoid it as well.

Some warnings...
Don't let yourself be taken advantage of by false friends. Know your true friends and keep them close. Be wary of folks who never pick up the tab -- the amount isn't important. If they're buying dinner at Chez McDonalds and you're buying dinner at Chez Phillipe, that's fine. If you're always buying dinner, you're in trouble... Your true friends won't abuse the relationship.

Don't overspend or overcommit yourself in your friendships -- it's easy to get caught up giving to people. Whether you're giving time, money, or even emotional capital, remember that you have to look after yourself. If your friends are true friends, they'll help look after you just as you look after them.

Please, please, please.. Remember this: This works for me. I am at peace in my life; I'm as happy as I've ever been, I suppose. This isn't a be-all-end-all blog post for friendship and there are caveats and contradictions to every rule. Your mileage may vary.

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TiVo 80 Hour Series2 DVR for $83.40 with Box and 1 Year of Service

2006-07-31T23:38:00.000-05:00

TiVo is having a promotion where for $83.40 you get the 80 hour box with a full year of service. You can also get the 80 hour dual tuner box with 1 year of service for only $155.40. This is a great deal for people looking to get a Series2 TiVo.

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Yeah! I've been looking at TiVo for a few months -- since my cousin bought my parents a TiVo for Father's Day. This is the deal I've been waiting on. Yes, I ordered mine today. If you're interested, please move quickly; this is a "limited time" offer available only while "supplies last".

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Some funny stories from the courthouse

2006-07-20T21:48:00.000-05:00

I'm a director of the local Chamber of Commerce -- I enjoy the opportunity to better my community and promote commerce and good business practices. Our Chamber offices recently moved to a new location and I attended the grand opening this afternoon. Being "election season" there were, of course, dignitaries of all stripe in attendance. I had the opportunity to talk to lots of interesting people and shake lots of sweaty hands (it was near 100 degrees outside today and the A/C isn't really up to par in the new building).

I talked for quite a long time with a person who's been employed in some capacity in the governing of our county for the better part of 40 years. A wealth of information, very helpful any time you want to get anything done. She shared a few stories, anecdotes really, from her time in various county government offices.

What kind of check?

There was a local counseling center that operated in the basement of the County Health Department. People could come in and talk to psychologists or psychiatrists about their problems -- for free or very little money. The story is told that a lady arrived and requested an appointment with a psychiatric professional. She met with the doctor and complained that she just couldn't satisfy her husband. After some conversation, the doctor recommended a "vaginal check" before their next meeting. She agreed and left. Several weeks later, the lady returned and complained that she still was having trouble. The doctor queried her, "Did you get the vaginal check?"

"No!" she replied, "and I've been checking the mailbox every day!"

I want a refund ...

An elderly couple made their way to the courthouse for a marriage license and a short ceremony by the judge. The lady working in the County Clerk's office noticed, while issuing the license, that the gentleman was somewhat hard-of-hearing as, when she asked him, "Would you please sign?" he replied that it was 3 o'clock. The couple was duly married and left, presumably, to begin their life of wedded bliss together.

A few weeks later the elderly gentleman returned to the County Clerk's office and told the deputy clerk that he'd like a refund! "A refund?" asked the clerk. "Yes," said the old man, "she don't give me none!"

She was taken aback -- no one had ever asked for a refund for a marriage license after he had been married in the courthouse! She scurried off to the County Clerk who laughed and walked from her office to speak with the old man. "Sir," said the clerk in her most serious tone, "you can't have a refund because the marriage wasn't consummated." He stared at her for several long moments with furrowed brow as he processed her response. Finally, he drew a deep breath, slammed his palm on the counter and said, "Dammit woman, I ain't constipated and I don't know what that has to do with anything anyhow. I want a refund!"

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Tips for cheering yourself up--from 1820.

2006-07-20T21:41:00.000-05:00

The Happiness Project: Tips for cheering yourself up--from 1820.:

11th. Don’t expect too much from human life—a sorry business at the best.

Some of the tips on this page are very helpful, I think. For example, "Live as well as you dare." Also, "Do good, and endeavour to please everybody of every degree."

I don't have much trouble remaining happy these days, but there have been times when staying happy has been a bit ... difficult. I particularly like the tip to, "Keep good blazing fires."

Have a look at these tips and tell me what you think.

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Are you better off single?

2006-07-14T21:10:00.000-05:00

Are you better off single?:

While snuggling up next to a warm body can be pretty fantastic, according to a survey conducted by the National Sleep Foundation, your bedmate can cause you to lose an average of 49 minutes of sleep per night. Sleeping two-to-a-bed just isnÂt as restful as snoozing solo.

Yes, but I'm not sure I want to be single. If I'm single, with whom do I snuggle on the couch? Pets don't count... If I'm single, with whom do I walk in the rain?

Of course, sleep is very important to me. I need my beauty rest -- yes I do. If I wear my earplugs and my eyemask, I'll bet I wouldn't even notice a woman in my bed... (Hrm, I'd better not tell any women that -- they might take it the wrong way.)

According to this article, single folks make-whoopee an average of only 49 times per year while married people get-it-on an average of 98 times -- the catch is that single folks supposedly have better lovin'. Besides the obvious question as to whether "more is better", I think star gazing on your back would probably be more special with someone special. I mean, jiggery-pokery isn't why we get married, but it's nothing to sneeze at! If you're looking for more fun euphemisms, check out this link from Wiktionary.

The article also asserts that single people are generally happier (or rather, less depressed). Of course, this makes some sense if you believe the article's assertion that single people are better looking ('cause everyone knows we let ourselves go when we get married) .

Read the article -- it's fun!

Truths men don't tell women

2006-07-05T21:53:00.000-05:00

11 "Don't-Tell-the-Wife" Secrets All Men Keep - MSN Lifestyle - Relationships:

With that much room left on our emotional-growth charts, we sense we've only begun to admire you in the ways we will when we're 40, 50 and -- God forbid -- 60. We can't explain this to you, because it would probably come out sounding like we don't love you now.

This is a neat little column -- and there are so many truths here. The particular truth, above, explaining that "Every year we love you more" I've seen proved time and time again. I see, weekly, 80 year old men who gaze at their wives in wonder. They're probably still wondering how they could be so lucky.

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For whom the bell tolls?

2006-07-04T23:06:00.000-05:00

For whom the bell tolls:

Tobacco (435,000 deaths, 18.1 percent of total U.S. deaths)
Poor diet and physical inactivity (400,000 deaths, 16.6 percent)
Alcohol consumption (85,000 deaths, 3.5 percent)
Microbial agents (75,000)
Toxic agents (55,000)
Motor vehicle crashes (43,000)
Incidents involving firearms (29,000)
Sexual behaviors (20,000)
Illicit use of drugs (17,000)

I'd like to say that the above causes of death are amazing to me -- but I live in the South. What *is* interesting in the above article is the explanation that the things we fear most are not in fact significant risks.

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This is my song...

2006-07-02T16:54:00.000-05:00

I was given the opportunity to sing at the Community Gospel Singing that's part of our local 4th of July celebration. Here are my remarks given before I sang my second song:

We live in the Greatest Nation in the World.

All we have, every day, every gift, and indeed every nation and all people are creations of God. Jesus is the sovereign lord of not only our town and of the state of Tennessee and of the United States, but also every nation and every person in the whole world.

Today, as they have throughout the history of our nation, American fighting men and women are creating, keeping, and defending peace in lands all over the globe. Our prayers are and should be with these warriors because they are fighting on the front lines of a war for peace and freedom. They are fighting for peace and justice in our name.

And, while their fight is just, we know that true peace -- the Peace that Christ died to bring us and the world -- cannot be achieved until the whole world acknowledges that he is Lord of all.

On this 4th of July, let us pray for Peace in our lifetime -- and let us pray that Christ will be lifted up and that all will some day serve him and that we can live as one under his banner of love.

Here are the lyrics to the song I presented, "This Is My Song":

This is my song, O God of all the nations
A song of peace for lands afar and mine
This is my home, the country where my heart is
here are my hopes, my dreams, my holy shrine
but other hearts in other lands are beating
with hopes and dreams as true and high as mine

My country's skies are bluer than the ocean
and sunlight beams on cloverleaf and pine
but other lands have sunlight too, and clover
and skies are everywhere as blue as mine
O hear my song, O God of all the nations,
a song of peace for their land and for mine

This is my prayer, O Lord of all earth's kingdoms
Thy kingdom come; on earth thy will be done
Let Christ be lifted up till all shall serve Him
and hearts united learn to live as one
O hear my prayer, thou God of all the nations
myself I give thee; let thy will be done.

The song is set to the tune of "Finlandia".

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Storm shelters

2006-06-28T23:14:00.000-05:00

0627062012
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Our storms a few months back prompted many people to construct storm shelters or safe rooms in or near their homes. Of course, in our part of the world, storm shelters have long been popular.

I'm told, by my father, that this type of shelter is not uncommon.

A guy was coming 'round the side of the house after we turned around... Do you think he knew we were looking at his shelter?

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Marriage

2006-06-26T22:36:00.000-05:00

My friends are all getting married...

Tori, Allison, Patrick -- all are married now. Patrick was the most recent. He was married on Saturday.

I'll be 28 in August. I'm waiting patiently for Miss Right. I'm not desperately searching. I'm convinced God will plop me down in front of her or her in front of me at the right time. My life is so terribly busy but I know that at the right time all this extra baggage I carry will come flying off like so many packages from the bed of a flat-bed truck as it rolls over a rail-road tie.

I've been terribly luck with my friends' marriages. Tori married a man who could be my brother. Allison married a man who could be my brother. I can tear up as I thank God for his Providence that brought these men to these women who are so important to me. Patrick's wife is charming and enchanting, though I've not had the opportunity to become as close to her as I might.

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